Alibi V.24 No.13 • March 26-April 1, 2015 

Odds & Ends

Odds and Ends

Dateline: England

A British Airways flight en route to Dubai was forced to make an emergency landing due to a “smelly poo.” According to the Telegraph, the plane turned around and came back to London just 30 minutes into its 7-hour flight. Cabin crew were reportedly unable to prevent a pungent odor from emanating from one of the ship’s toilets, and the plane returned home for “health and safety reasons.” Hertsmere councilor Abhishek Sachdev was on the plane and tweeted, “Insane! Our BA flight to Dubai returned back to Heathrow because of a smelly poo in the toilet!” According to Sachdev, the pilot told passengers the smell was not due to a technical fault with the plane. Speaking to the MailOnline, Sachdev said the pilot described the stench as coming from “liquid fecal excrement. Those are the words he used.” Passengers had to wait 15 hours for another flight. “We are sorry for the discomfort to our customers,” British Airways said in a statement. “We provided them with hotel accommodation and rescheduled the flight to depart the next day.”

Dateline: California

Police in Madera, Calif., say 23-year-old car theft suspect Jose Espinoza tried to avoid arrest by disguising himself with a can of spray paint. Shockingly, it did not work. On Saturday, March 14, Espinoza reportedly fled from a stolen car parked near his home. Espinoza returned to his home where he used a can of black spray paint to cover his face. He then “attempted to hide against a white wall in the home’s yard,” police spokesperson Josiah Arnold told FOX6Now.com. In a sarcastic Facebook post, the City of Madera Police Department summarized the entire incident: “Last night Jose Espinoza fled from a stolen car. Officers arrested Jose later in the evening after he fled a second time. This time Jose spray painted his face black in an attempt to camouflage himself. The camouflage was ineffective.” Espinoza was arrested for receiving stolen property, and his bail was set at $35,000.

Dateline: Indiana

A motorist who has had his driver’s license suspended 68 times in the last 14 years will finally spend some time behind bars. Repeat offender Dustin Wheeler, 33, was sentenced by Putnam County Judge Denny Bridges to serve 20 days in jail after he pleaded guilty to driving with a suspended license. “I was a state trooper for 27 years,” the judge remarked during the trial, “and I’ve never seen someone with 68 suspensions.” Wheeler already owes more than $1,875 in unpaid fines and fees, dating back to 1999. Despite the latest conviction, Putnam County Prosecutor Tim Bookwalter told the Greencastle Banner-Graphic Wheeler will only spend 10 days in jail thanks to a new state law that went into effect last year. The new law is designed to keep traffic offenders out of jail or prison. “They [legislators] thought we’ve been too hard on them,” Bookwalter said. “But you’ve got someone with 68 suspensions, and they’re taking away our ability to lock them up? You think he’s going to get better?” Unsurprisingly (and ineffectually), Judge Bridges also suspended Wheeler’s driver’s license for an additional 90 days.

Dateline: California

Following widespread criticism the Archdiocese of San Francisco has agreed to remove a sprinkler system designed to soak homeless people seeking shelter in the doorways of St. Mary’s Cathedral. The system, which sprays water onto the ground around the church for about 75 seconds every 30 to 60 minutes, was installed two years ago. Stories about the church’s anti-homeless system started circulating on the internet recently, causing a backlash against the seemingly uncharitable attitude toward the city’s destitute. In a statement the Archdiocese said its “intentions have been misunderstood and [we] recognize that the method used was ill-conceived. It actually has had the opposite effect from what it was intended to do, and for this we are very sorry.” The Washington Post also pointed out that the system violated the city’s water use laws. The San Francisco Department of Building Inspection apparently checked out the building earlier this month and issued a notice for the church’s “unpermitted downspout.”

Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.