Alibi V.25 No.21 • May 26-June 1, 2016 

Odds & Ends

Odds and Ends

Dateline: Colorado

Here’s a handy reminder why background checks are essential in the field of child care. A Colorado woman is facing charges of robbery and child abuse after allegedly robbing a bank while babysitting two kids. Rachel Einspahr, 28, was arrested on Friday, May 13, after police say she pulled up to the drive-through lane at the Colorado East Bank & Trust in Severence with two children and passed a note to the teller through a vacuum tube. According to CBS Denver, the note read, “Do not sound alarm, the man in the very back wants $100s and $50s ... no dye packs or trackers ... he has gun on my kids.” Fearing the children were in danger, the teller handed over $500 in cash. Deputies from the Weld County Sheriff’s Office were able to catch up to Einspahr’s white SUV shortly after the incident. There was no man in the vehicle at the time. At first Einspahr tried to maintain that an unknown man had forced her to go to the bank and steal the money. Deputies interviewed the two children, however, and they said they had been to the bank and the park and had not been kidnapped at gunpoint. During the questioning, Einspahr allegedly told police, “I can’t go back to jail.” She eventually confessed to the crime, telling police she needed the money to pay off the $15,000 restitution/plea deal for a previous crime. Turns out the bad babysitter had already been charged in a case involving over 30 counts of forgery, ID theft and felony theft. In addition to that case, she also has a second open case in Larimer County on two counts of ID theft, according to her arrest affidavit. She was taken to the Weld County Jail on one count of robbery and two counts of child abuse. The children were unharmed.

Dateline: Louisiana

A state representative withdrew an amendment that would have required Louisiana’s exotic dancers to be young and thin after a sharp rebuke from colleagues. Rep. Walt Leger, D-New Orleans, had brought Senate Bill 468—which would require exotic dancers at strip clubs to be at least 21 years of age—to the floor of the house. That’s when Rep. Kenny Havard, R-Jackson, proposed an amendment to the bill that would require strippers to be between the ages of 21 and 28 and “no more than 160 pounds in weight.” The lawmaker eventually withdrew the amendment after Rep. Nancy Landry, R-Lafayette, labeled it “offensive.” State Rep. Julie Stokes, R-Kenner, jumped in, calling the debate a “disrespectful and disgusting” example of sexism in the male-dominated legislature. “It was a bad idea,” Stokes told her colleagues. “I can’t even believe the behavior in here. I think we need to call an end to this. I hear derogatory comments about women in this place regularly. I hear and I see women get treated differently than men, and I’m going to tell you what, you gave me the perfect forum to talk about it right now.” Havard later told the New Orleans Times-Picayune his amendment was meant as a “joke” and that he’s never witnessed any sexism in the state legislature. “I haven’t seen that at all,” he told the newspaper. “That’s why I’m not going to apologize. It would give credence to that comment.” Senate Bill 468—minus Havard’s amendment—eventually passed 96-0.

Dateline: Florida

A man tried to warn Key West police that actress Shirley MacLaine would be responsible for bringing a string of biblical plagues down upon the island—and ended up getting arrested on drug charges for his trouble. Keysnet.com reports that on April 10, artist William Selesnick called police to warn them that a series of fires would be set by followers of famed Hollywood star Shirley MacLaine. Key West Police Officer Todd Stevens noted in his report that, “When pressed whether these would be literal or metaphorical fires, Selesnick told me I would have to wait” to find out. Selesnick called police from the Lighthouse Guest House at 11:05am, telling dispatchers that the series of fires would be “followed by a riot” and “cleansing rains.” Police responded to the 64-year-old Selesnick’s temporary residence and ended up discovering a small mound of marijuana resting atop a laptop computer. According to officers Selesnick, “asked us if he could roll one.” Instead he was arrested for misdemeanor possession of about two grams of marijuana. Selesnick was released from Stock Island jail early the next morning after posting a $328 bond. The next night police say he was shot in the thigh after an argument with a man named William Langford. Police say the two events were unconnected. So far anyway, MacLaine has refrained from torching Key West.

Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.