Alibi V.15 No.48 • Nov 30-Dec 6, 2006 

Newscity

Have a Drink?

Sandia National Labs and its critics disagree over the danger posed by a toxic landfill to Albuquerque’s drinking water

Think twice before drinking from your tap. According to recent studies by Sandia National Laboratories, 13 organic carcinogenic compounds have been detected in two monitoring wells in or near the labs’ Mixed Waste Landfill, located near Kirtland Airforce Base. It’s a discovery that doesn’t sit well with local government watchdog group Citizen Action, who believes the contaminants could pose a health risk for Albuquerqueans.

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Thin Line

A Print Journalist's View on TV News--I've always harbored a simmering hatred for TV news.

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Talking Points

Will the Real Comedians Please Stand-Up

An interview with local funny man Marc Shuter

Being funny isn't something to take lightly. Sure, you're the friend Mary turns to when she needs to chuckle off a tough day at the office. Yeah, Mark is always nudging you at the bar saying, “Tell them the one about the rabid monkey and the three-legged elephant.” So you can tell a joke, but do you have what it takes to be a stand-up comic? With a cup of coffee in hand and a world-famous Frontier breakfast burrito stuffing his face, local up-and-coming comedian Marc Shuter tells the Alibi why funny isn't the only skill you need to bring on stage.

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Council Bite

"Ding" Goes the Trolley

A recap of the Nov. 20 Council meeting

Irate citizens hurled verbal pitchforks at the administration and City Council during the Nov. 20 Council meeting.

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The Real Side

The Streetcar Railroad, Episode II:

My developer is better than your developer

When we last rode the Trolley Named Folly, Mayor Martin Chavez and City Council President Martin Heinrich hit us with a massive tax increase to pay for a $270 million streetcar line along Central ["The Streetcar Railroad," Nov. 23-29]. But they weren’t able to slip this massive project by without the public taking notice. So now they’ve promised to let us vote on it [read this week's "Council Bite” on page 8 for more details]. How considerate of them.

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Punch Line

Wal-Mart and Gays

The righteous new cause of the religious right

I’m the last guy to stand up for Wal-Mart. Sure, they sell stuff cheap, but it’s because they pay substandard wages, offer few full-time jobs, stiff employees on health insurance and force suppliers to sell below market or lose huge contracts. But I have to admit, I feel sorry for them for the grief they’re getting from the radical Christian right over the company’s ties to gay and lesbian groups.

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Ortiz y Pino

No Exit

Will our troops ever come home?

A lot of the post-election discussion about Iraq has centered on when (not if) we should start pulling out our troops. John McCain serves as the lonely holdout for sending in more troops, while Congressman Charles Rangel suggests it’s time to reinstitute the draft—and spread around the misery.

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Odds & Ends

Dateline: England--Dedicated James Bond fan David Fearn has legally changed his name to all 21 official 007 film titles. The 23-year-old from Walsall, Stratfordshire, is now known as “James Dr. No From Russia With Love Goldfinger Thunderball You Only Live Twice On Her Majesty’s Secret Service Diamonds Are Forever Live And Let Die The Man With The Golden Gun The Spy Who Loved Me Moonraker For Your Eyes Only Octopussy A View To A Kill The Living Daylights License To Kill Golden Eye Tomorrow Never Dies The World Is Not Enough Die Another Day Casino Royale Bond.” The 69-word name is the longest in the UK Deed Poll Service’s history.

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Letters

I generally find Laura Sanchez more annoyingly glib than accurate, but her reporting on the Modern Streetcar Project was a new low for her and for the Alibi [Council Watch, “Pandas on Wheels,” Nov. 16-22].

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Image via Pixabay

EVENT HORIZON ()

Silk and Lights and Everything Nice

Dragon Lights Albuquerque

Formerly known as the Chinese Lantern Festival, see the all new larger-than-life, fully-illuminated lanterns, Chinese cultural performances and special handicrafts.
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Image via Pixabay

EVENT HORIZON ()

Hit All the Dusty Trails

Opt Outside

Black Friday gets more and more absurd every year. In fact, for many retailers, the humanity-crushing shopping rush begins on frigging Thanksgiving Day. What a fun, sexy time. Avoid all of that this year with the Opt Outside event as all 34 New Mexico State Parks wave their day-use fees. Which means seeing our beautiful state wilderness is absolutely free. With the support of retailers such as REI, the entirety of Friday, Nov. 23 turns into a day of functional family time or serene solitude as you traverse the trails of what makes New Mexico the Land of Enchantment. Break the brutal sale shopping traditional with a beautiful day in the sunshine.
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Image courtesy of visitalbuquerque.org

EVENT HORIZON ()

My God, It's a River of Lights!

River of Lights

N.M.'s largest all-original holiday light show with over 550 sculptures and millions of twinkling lights.
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Image via Pixabay

EVENT HORIZON ()

Baby, It's Seriously F#@!ing Cold Outside

Winterfest 2018

Ready to get in the holiday spirit? Yeah, neither are we. Fortunately, a little community spirit and fellowship can be infectious. The good ol' city of the 505 is doing their damnedest to provide a little Christmas conversion therapy with this year's Winterfest. Civic Plaza becomes a holly, jolly winter wonderland just two days after Thanksgiving on Saturday, Nov. 24 from 3 to 7pm. Just what makes this so jolly? What the hell could be more merry than the opening of the Holiday Ice Qube Skating Rink with free skating and $3 skate rentals? Local vendors ease the blow with handmade goods and retail therapy. Not to mention, wintery comfort foods, hot cocoa, eggnog and adult libations are abound, thank goddess. The seasonal décor is up and the fat dude in the red suit is there to listen to requests for all the needless crap on your wishlist. This is a free and all-ages event. So put on a coat, skate like a Peanut and get in the damn spirit.
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Image via Pixabay

EVENT HORIZON ()

A Consensual Cuddle Puddle

The Cuddle Revolution

This is a completely platonic experience for adults only. Please arrive on time. Use a series of exercises to practice consensual and safe touch, as well as authentic connection.
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Image via Pixabay

EVENT HORIZON ()

It's Not a Hula

Tahitian Dance Workshop

Don't get it twisted. Tahitian dance is not the hula. Tahitian dance is centered around the hips for storytelling instead of the hands, and it's from … wait for it … Tahiti, not Hawaii. This style, also called 'Ori Tahiti, is a far more aggressive style in most cases, especially from the male dancers. Shock. Kellie Villicano of the Ka Lā Kapu Polynesian Dance School brings this Tahitian Dance Workshop
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