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The Daily Word in epic mustaches, tasteless paternity tests and heroic bookkeepers

A school shooting was thwarted by empathy and compassion.
An Albuquerque man is a sensation on Breaking Bad. Because of his epic mustache.
It's super lame that "blue moons" are in no way blue.
Has a young girl just been rescued from a psychotic creep who killed her family? What a great time to demand a paternity test!
What do you have to do to get banned from every farm in the UK? Fuck a goat? Oh.
NASA is selling off the huge crawlers it used to transport space shuttles to the Cape Canaveral launch platform. They'll probably go to a company in the private space industry, but if you act quickly you might be able to snag one. Shoot them an offer at public-
And finally, SEO + Google = crappy information.