Like a dispassionate alien entity, the Weekly Alibi captured many specimens of amorous artwork for its Tenth Annual Valentine's Day Card Contest. The ensuing battle was deadly and illogical with few survivors. Behold now the victorious entries.
“Zero Hour” on ABC
The National Treasure films weren’t good by any conventional definition of the word, but they were fun. After all who doesn’t love a globe-hopping treasure hunt—especially when it comes wrapped in a conspiracy and painted over with a few layers of historical significance? Just ask Indiana Jones. Or Tom Hanks in that Da Vinci thing. These clue-dropping treasure hunts aren’t something episodic television has had much luck recreating. But ABC’s new thriller “Zero Hour” certainly gives it the old college try. And if the pilot episode is any indication, the network might have something halfway decent on its hands.
An electronic exchange with Sir Richard Bishop
Seasoned Actress Sobel Directs “The Seagull”
The stage is a scuffed square in the middle of a black-painted room. Rows of chairs rise around it, bleacher-style, on all four sides. No curtains or fancy sets divide those watching the action from the action itself. This is the Vortex, Albuquerque’s highly regarded community theater now in its 36th year—and, as it happens, a fitting home for the stripped-down intimacy of Anton Chekhov’s classic drama-comedy, The Seagull.
The art and grandeur of burlesque is at its best when it's “classy,” when sexy ladies in illustrious, vibrant costumes can entertain and entice you, as the world of the mundane drifts far into the background. That’s the impression given by Gypsy Louise, burlesque legend, hall-of-famer, and performer in the 7th Annual Southwest Burlesque Showcase at the Kimo Theater this Friday and Saturday night.
The Gila Wilderness unfurls from the northernmost point of Silver City for miles, untouched and untamed. Along with the Aldo Leopold Wilderness and the Blue Mesa Wilderness, the Gila forms the almost three million acres of the Gila National Forest. A haven to Ponderosa pines, a coursing river and native fauna, the Gila Wilderness has been unmarred by human touch since it was declared the country's first wilderness area in 1924. There are no roads, no paths—even bikes are prohibited in the undeveloped wilds of the Gila.
Nearly 1,500 people responded to our survey. Who were these people? Let's consult the pie charts.
What did we learn? I'll leave that to our panel of experts.
The results are in, and it comes as no surprise that the Duke is one kinky city. The purpose of sex has evolved for many into a recreational activity, rather than a species-perpetuating endeavor. Note that, of the 800+ answers, not a single response included “procreation.” Instead, we see a varied, colorful list of hedonistic sensory indulgences, elaborate fantasies, yearnings for specific body parts, items of clothing, bodily fluids, and appetites for complicated sex acts that would challenge even the most adept multi-tasker.
While reviewing the results from the Alibi's first sex survey, I was delighted to see that many of our neighbors play very well with others. Within the confines of relationships and randomness of delightful happenstance, friends are hooking up with friends, couples with couples and sometimes just inviting others to watch. In addition to these delightful tromps into the land of non-monogamy, my heart was warmed by the dozens of contributions that gush about partners, husbands, wives and every combination therein.
I once heard it said from a very wise man in the restaurant industry that "men go where the women are—and women go where the bathrooms are clean."
Call it “The List,” call it a “hall pass,” slap whatever name on it you like: Even the most committed couples can make concessions for their partners sleeping with other people. So long as those other people are celebrities. The thinking is twofold. Firstly, long-term relationship or not, you’d be a fool to pass up an opportunity to manhandle People Magazine's “Sexiest Man Alive.” Secondly, your odds of meeting, seducing and actually closing the deal with a famous person are slim-to-none—so what’s the harm in a little fantasy fling?
BDSM Tips for Newbies
Curious about consensual non-monogamy? Well, you've come to the right place. In a world where there is open communication and negotiation no one has to cheat, and the likelihood of having your needs met (and even your fantasies and desires) is very high. We're going to cover the basics, and if that whets your appetite or peaks your interest, we'll include some easy ways to find out more.
Now that the cat is out of the bag, what are you going to do with the information? Learning about sex can be intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be. Self Serve is Albuquerque’s Best Sexy Shop, as voted by Alibi readers, and can offer an alternative to the old-school sex shop. Now that you have some of the intimate details of your fellow Albuquerqueans, you can proceed with confidence and dive into your fantasies head first. Here are some of our tips based on the survey results, but feel free to check us out online for more info at selfservetoys.com
We had more sexy graphs that we could fit in print!
Arabesque animated fable offers a feline’s take on Middle Eastern religion
From the very first frames, viewers can tell the adult-oriented French cartoon The Rabbi’s Cat is going to feature some lovely, bright animation and an exotic setting. That’s almost but not quite enough to leaven a muddled story that requires a bit too much contemplation. The film is based on the work of French comic book artist Joann Sfar, who wrote and directed the lavishly animated, mostly successful biopic Gainsbourg: A Heroic Life. Sfar co-writes and co-directs The Rabbi’s Cat, ensuring the artist’s vision is, for better or worse, fully preserved.
Best & Worst Super Bowl Commercials
A blackout, an army of Beyoncés and an intentional safety: Super Bowl XLVII may have been the first Super Bowl in a long time that was more interesting than the multi-million-dollar commercials surrounding it. In fact, this year’s ads weren’t a very standout collection, consisting of mostly rehashed and underwhelming entries. What’s the point of spending millions on a 30-second spot if people aren’t going to be buzzing about it the next day?
Vinaigrette knows how to dress a salad
Dead guy stalks cute girl in conventionally quirky zombie romance
“Cute” is not a word that can be applied to a lot of zombie movies, but it’s the most apt description available for Warm Bodies, a PG-13 undead romance from indie writer-director Jonathan Levine. Levine has spent the last few years making almost-but-not-quite cult films like All the Boys Love Mandy Lane, The Wackness and 50/50. Warm Bodies follows in that tradition, a likable but imperfect black comedy that will find moderate box office success while infecting a handful of loyal fans.
The bedbug may be the best known—and feared—pest in the country beside the cockroach. The media commonly reports that they're growing in numbers and spreading across the country. In reality, they've always been around and always will be.
Hector Peña crafts conduits for mojo
Changing Attitudes Towards Femininity Showcased in Tamarind Exhibition
In Good in the Kitchen, curator John Mulvaney explores the ways in which societal changes in the mid to late 20th century have reshaped the production of contemporary art. Specifically, the exhibition addresses how both men and women portray ideas about domesticity in a post-feminist environment.
“The Taste” on ABC
ABC’s new cooking competition “The Taste” promises—repeatedly, it must be noted—to be a cooking competition “unlike any you’ve ever seen.” This is a completely accurate description—but only if you’ve never seen a food-based show before. For the rest of us, it’s a totally generic, frustratingly unsatisfying taster menu of refried ideas.