The Week In Sloth: “Surviving Exodus,” Peter Pan Live! And “Eaten Alive”

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Thursday 4

“Surviving Exodus” (Discovery/Animal Planet/Science/TLC 6pm) US Army National Guard Special Forces Master Sergeant Terry Schappert, animal trainer Dave Salmoni and astrophysicist Hakeem Oluseyi search for evidence of the biblical tale. Frankly, that doesn’t seem like the best team of detectives for this particular assignment.

Peter Pan Live! (KOB-4 7pm) NBC follows up last year’s “Sound of Music Live!” with another sing-along classic of theater. Those who complained about the casting of Carrie Underwood as Maria will no doubt be overjoyed to see the casting of Allison Williams as Peter Pan.

Friday 5

“How Murray Saved Christmas” (KOB-4 7pm) A cranky deli owner (Jerry Stiller) is forced to fill in for Santa in this new animated holiday special. Based on the picture book by Mike Reiss and David Catrow.

“A Very Grammy Christmas” (KRQE-13 8pm) Ariana Grande, Maroon 5, Tim McGraw, Pharrell Williams and Mary J. Blige sing stuff. Christmas stuff, probably.

One Child (Sundance 7pm) A Chinese girl adopted by English parents is called back to Guangzhou to help her birth mother who has been accused of murder. Katie Leung (Cho Chang in the Harry Potter films) stars in this two-night miniseries.

Saturday 6

Wally Lamb’s Wishin’ & Hopin’ (Lifetime 8pm) In 1964 Connecticut a substitute teacher and a new Russian student ensure that Mouseketeer Annette Funicello’s less-famous cousin has a good Christmas. Molly Ringwald and Meat Loaf star. No, really. It’s based on Wally Lamb’s comic novella.

Sunday 7

“Naked and Afraid” (Discovery 6:45pm) Pals James Franco and Seth Rogen (stars of the upcoming film The Interview) contribute their own (most likely tongue-in-cheek) episode of “Naked and Afraid.”

“Eaten Alive” (Discovery 7pm) Wildlife filmmaker Paul Rosolie dons a custom-built, “snake-proof” suit and allows himself to be swallowed by an anaconda, proving … No idea. That it’s dark in there?

The Red Tent (Lifetime 7pm) In the Bible Dinah—you know, daughter of Leah and Jacob—gets one lousy line of dialogue. On Lifetime Network she gets a two-night miniseries.

“The Librarians” (TNT 8pm) TNT’s movie series about librarians at the Metropolitan Public Library being part of a secret organization that hunts down magical artifacts (Return to King Solomon’s Mines, Curse of the Judas Chalice, Quest for the Spear) turns into a weekly TV series.

“Robot Chicken” (Cartoon Network 12:30am) The complete title of this holiday special is “The Robot Chicken Lots of Holidays But Don’t Worry Christmas Is Still In There Too So Pull the Stick Out of Your Ass Fox News Special.” That kinda says it all.

Monday 8

“The Great Christmas Light Fight” (KOAT-7 7pm) Nothing says “holiday spirit” like neighbors fighting with one another over who can put up the most obnoxious holiday light display in order to win $50,000.

Tuesday 9

“The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show” (KRQE-13 9pm) Taylor Swift, Ed Sheeran and the ubiquitous Ariana Grande perform. Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio and Candice Swanepoel strip down.

Wednesday 10

“AFI Master Class: The Art of Collaboration” (TCM 6pm) Director Rob Reiner (This Is Spinal Tap, When Harry Met Sally…) and his longtime editing partner Robert Leighton give a master class on working together. That’s followed by their 1985 film The Sure Thing, in which John Cusack sets out to bang Nicollette Sheridan and winds up kissing Daphne Zuniga.
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