Alibi V.24 No.14 • April 2-8, 2015 

Week in Sloth

“Olympus” on Syfy

Thursday 2
.

“Olympus” (Syfy 8pm) Syfy comes out swinging with this Clash of the Titans-esque fantasy series.

“The Slap” (KOB-4 9pm) With tonight’s season finale, we finally get to find out who got slapped ... or who did the slapping ... or ... What’s this show about again?

“Lip Sync Battle” (Spike 8pm) Celebrities go head-to-head in an epic lip sync battle while host LL Cool J looks on like a mad Roman emperor.

Friday 3

“Meet the Smiths” (TBS 7pm) Thanks, but I don’t need any more reality show families in my life. I can die a happy man never having watched NBA analyst Kenny Smith and his wife, “The Price Is Right” model Gwendolyn Osborne-Smith, talk about renovating their bathroom.

“Backstreet Boys: Show ’Em What You’re Made Of” (VH1 7pm) Teenage girls who are devastated over the news that Zayn Malik has left One Direction, please console yourself with the fact that your boy band crush will one day be middle-aged, balding and irrelevant.

“The Grace Helbig Show” (E! 11:30pm) With Chelsea Handler gone, easygoing comedienne Grace Helbig gets her own celebrity chat show.

Saturday 4

Killer Crush (Lifetime 6pm) A student’s obsession with her former professor takes a dangerous turn when she becomes a caregiver for his wife. Sounds like your standard Lifetime movie. But it does star Daveigh Chase, best known as the scary ghost girl from The Ring. She’s all growed up now and seducing middle-aged professors.

A Bone to Pick: An Aurora Teagarden Mystery (HMC 7pm) Candace Cameron Bure (D.J. Tanner!) stars in this librarian murder mystery based on the novels by “True Blood” creator Charlaine Harris.

Sunday 5

Sinatra: All or Nothing At All (HBO 6pm) HBO airs a two-night documentary miniseries about the life and times of one Francis Albert Sinatra.

If There Be Thorns (Lifetime 6pm) The third of V.C. Andrews’ incest-based thrillers undergoes the Lifetime treatment.

“American Odyssey” (KOB-4 9pm) In this Traffic-like action drama, an international cover-up explodes when the lives of a female Special Forces soldier, a disillusioned corporate lawyer and a political activist unexpectedly collide.

“The Lizzie Borden Chronicles” (Lifetime 8pm) Christina Ricci reprises her role as Lizzie Borden in this eight-episode TV series sequel (!) to the nutty biopic from last year.

“Wolf Hall” (KNME-5 9pm) Attention Anglophiles: The BBC adapts Hilary Mantel’s historical novel about the rise to power of Thomas Cromwell in the court of Henry VIII.

“The Raft” (National Geographic 8pm) For its newest reality competition, National Geographic strands people on tiny rubber rafts in the middle of the ocean.

Monday 6

“Toronto Blue Jays at New York Yankees” (ESPN 11pm) Winter must be over, because the boys of summer are here. Baseball season kicks off with this cross-border battle.

Tuesday 7

“The Runner-Up” (Esquire 8pm) Two things that annoy me are singing competitions and politics. And yet, this documentary series, chronicling former “American Idol” contestant Clay Aiken’s campaign to win a congressional seat in North Carolina, looks fascinating.

Wednesday 8

“Little Women: Terra’s Little Family” (Lifetime 7pm) I’m sorry, Lifetime. See my note for “Meet the Smiths.”