“Small Town, Big Mayor” (UP 7:30pm) D’Lo, Miss. has all of 450 residents. But the mayor dresses like Boss Hogg and has his own reality show. Because it’s 2017.
“What Would Diplo Do?” (Viceland 8pm) This absurd-sounding sitcom, executive produced by Diplo himself, centers on a fictionalized version of the popular EDM DJ (played here by James Van Der Beek—yes, that James Van Der Beek).
“Comrade Detective” (Amazon streaming anytime) Channing Tatum, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Nick Offerman, Jenny Slate, Mahershala Ali and Bobby Cannavale provide the “new” English voice-overs for a long-lost, 1980s Romanian buddy cop show. The retro-campy inside joke is that the show isn’t old at all, but a modern, shot-in-Romania spoof of ’80s action shows.
“WE Day” (KRQE-13 7pm) Selena Gomez hosts this telecast in which musicians and celebrities (Alicia Keys, DJ Khaled, Josh Gad, Demi Lovato and Miss Piggy, among them) try to educate young people about such social issues as poverty, equality, environment and accessibility.
“ELeague: Road to the International DOTA 2 Championships” (TBS 8pm) Professional video gamers play Defense of the Ancients 2, a multiplayer online battle arena mod for the video game Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos, for money. You watch. Allegedly.
Love at the Shore (Hallmark 7pm) A single mom (Amanda Righetti from “The Mentalist”) falls in love with an “unconventional” surfer (Peter Porte from “The Young and the Restless”) while on summer vacation. See, ladies, it’s never too late to hook up with Jeff Spicoli.
Sharknado 5: Global Swarming (Syfy 6pm) Sorry, friends, can’t do anything tonight. TV obviously wants me drunk and on the couch.
“Life of Kylie” (E! 10pm) The Arctic ice shelf has broken off, North Korea is lobbing missiles on a weekly basis, and Trump is turning the White House into a cheap knockoff of “The Apprentice.” And yet, I find giving Kylie Jenner her own reality show to be the most telling sign of the apocalypse.
Brillo Box (3 Cents Off) (HBO 8pm) This documentary follows an Andy Warhol sculpture as it travels from a family’s living room to an international auction at Christie’s.
“Snap Decision” (GSN 7pm) Former “In Living Color” star David Alan Grier hosts this “comedic game show” in which contestants try to guess things about random people on the street, based on first impressions.
“Swedish Dicks” (Pop 9pm) A former stuntman (Peter Stormare) and a struggling DJ join forces as a pair of unlicensed private investigators in Los Angeles. Traci Lords and Keanu Reeves are among the guest stars in this Swedish-American coproduction.
“The Story of Diana” (KOAT-7 8pm) Networks strain to find new revelations about Princess Diana, who died 20 years ago this month. My favorite so far? She was a “naughty” lady, who snuck her young sons candy bars!
“Meet the Evanchos” (TLC 8:03pm) What are the parents of 17-year-old, second-place-on-“America’s Got Talent” singer Jackie Evancho like? Funny, I never wondered about it. But now that you bring it up? Nope, still don’t care.