The Oatmeal


V.21 No.24 |

news

The Daily Word in the "forest boy" hoax, the "Kindness in America" hoax, a Subgenius shakeup and Captain Picard Day

The Daily Word

Undercover APD officer goes to "Chinese massage" parlour, asks for massage and then arrests woman when she agrees to give a massage.

Susana Martinez and some legislators use their personal email for state business and some say that excludes those emails from public records requests.

NM Governor Martinez doesn't like Obama's executive order allowing children of illegals to gain legal status. Washington Post says newly made citizens will take our jobs.

Is Obama going to go after the weed vote?

The British recovered a lost WWI submarine with an interesting history.

In this bath salts freakout the guy was scared he was going to be eaten.

The "Kindness in America" author actually shot himself.

"Forest Boy" was lying.

New Jersey wine competes with French wine.

Lacey Wildd wants to get a thirteenth breast enlargement even though her tits could explodde.

Swedish authorities failed to prove that explicit Manga qualifies as child pornography.

Meet AJ Weberman, Bob Dylan's single most obsessed fan.

Website posts The Oatmeal's cartoons without permission, then threatens to sue when the cartoonist pointed this out.

Check out this bizarre David Hasselhoff commercial.

Ten terrible tattoos of hard rock hideousness.

Babies in cellophane!

It's finally over.

Reverend Stang retired from leading the Church of the Subgenius because he is tired of the asshole membership.

Happy Captain Picard Day!

V.20 No.47 |

NEWS

The Daily Word in Thanksgiving chaos, GOP race and an arrested snowman.

Happy Cyber Monday!

The Daily Word

New Mexico teen accused of kidnapping younger boy.

UNM sports: Soccer team sees end of NCAA tournament. Basketball team beats Boston College to become “consolation champions” (5th place) in the 76 Classic tournament.

So what exactly is the Thanksgiving/Black Friday damage?

NASA launches Mars Science Labratory.

I didn't know this was a thing, but I'm glad that I do now: The 21 best Keanu conspiracy meme images.

Stanford brain study may shed new light on autism.

“Frosty the Snowman” arrested at a Maryland parade.

Newt's got a chance to narrow the GOP field.

Remember that lady who was suspected of pepper-spraying people at Wal-Mart? Apparently she's not talking to LAPD.

Remember that dude that was accused of dressing up as Gumby and robbing a 7-Eleven? He pleaded guilty.

The Oatmeal's take on Thanksgiving as a kid vs. Thanksgiving as an adult.

Pimping your ride on a budget.

V.20 No.46 |

NEWS

The Daily Word in the tea party backing Mitt, more red light changes, and some celeb booing.

The Daily Word

Huckabee says the Tea party should rally around Mitt Romney if he is nominated as GOP candidate. Also, watch Romney “shake it up” on SNL.

New York man charged with plotting city pipe-bomb attacks.

Albuquerque traffic signals could get some changes via city councilors.

Woman arrested for trying to sell a purse back to the lady from whom she stole it ... who also happened to be her own next door neighbor.

Alford's Lobos get 76-71 win against Arizona State - a good feeling after the New Mexico State incident.

Did you miss the American Music Awards? Here are the "five biggest jaw droppers" of the night.

Michelle Obama and Jill Biden were booed at a NASCAR event.

Also, Vladimir Putin was booed at a martial arts fight.

Extreme sidewalk chalk.

Rumors floating around of an Amazon Kindle phone for 2012.

A pothole "saves a girl's life" after she swallows a heart-shaped locket.

The Oatmeal on recent Wikipedia donation pleas.

Who doesn't like adorable pictures of cats snuggling with stuffed animals? Or of ones that jump like kangaroos?

V.20 No.45 |

NEWS

The Daily Word in Lobo sports, European debt crises, and an ADHD galaxy cluster.

The Daily Word

It was an excellent weekend for UNM sports. The Lobo football team gets 21-14 conference win over UNLV, Steve Alford's men's basketball team opens the season with 92-40 triumph over New Orleans, and the men's soccer team takes the conference championship over Cal State Bakersfield.

Oh, also, Monster Jam was at Tingley this weekend all vintage-style.

Sexual abuse charges against Jerry Sandusky suggest his youth mentoring charity might have been a pipeline for potential victims.

Hawaiian recording artist busts out “Occupy” song during fancy dinner hosted by President Obama.

Continue to rest assured that this guy will never, ever lose your trust.

Cracked.com's take on the 6 Most Horrifying Lies The [Processed] Food Industry is Feeding You.

Parkour.

Bernalillo County officials working on new “realistic” ad campaigns against drunk driving.

Europe risks EU split in wake of major debt crises.

The Oatmeal illustrates what it would be like if his brain were an imaginary friend.

Palindromes (Palin-dromes).

You know those cool high-powered magnetic ball desk-top toy things? Yeah, they're dangerous.

Super freaking cool pencil carvings.

Strange hyperactive galaxy cluster spotted by Hubble about 9 billion light-years away .

Placebo buttons.

Thanks to CM and CP for the help.

V.20 No.38 |

NEWS

The Daily Word in Locksley boot, affirmative action brownies, and Amazon's latest technology.

Brought to you by the artist formerly known as the US Space Program.

The Daily Word

Mike Locksley gets canned after loss to Sam Houston State.

Albuquerque teen gets arrested for burping in class.

Casino shooting leaves Hells Angels leader dead and two others injured.

City acquires some more balloon landin' land.

NASA's dead satellite takes its fall.

Earth-shattering news about Catwoman's mask.

Controversy erupts over affirmative action bake sale at Berkley.

Doesn't this guy know you aren't supposed to try to reenact movie premises that involve having to cut off your own limbs?

Neil Armstrong labels the US Space Program as "embarrassing".

So what did we get from the US Space Program?

Amazon gets ready to release new tablet, Apple is actually a bit worried.

Bathroom graffiti responses.

The Oatmeal on the Netflix changes.

Man calls police during a 30-mile chase Thursday to tell them that deputies "needed to leave him alone."

Princess Bride Monopoly Board!

V.20 No.34 |

NEWS

The Daily Word in New Mexico crime, East Coast hurricanes, and diamond space planets.

The Daily Word

Rio Rancho customer shoots and kills bouncer at TD's Show Club.

New Mexico State Police officer on “administrative leave” after weekend arrest (his own that is).

Michele Bachmann says God is using current natural disasters as a political warning... just kidding!

Where's the super hero? Astronomers discover planet made of diamond.

Who wore it better? Jimmy McMillan or this cat?

Walmart just gets classier and classier: Police arrest runaway gunman at Albuquerque store.

A slightly interesting time lapse video of Hurricane Irene.

The Oatmeal on weather predictions.

Ancient Neanderthal procreation was critical for our modern immune systems.

British woman suffers breast implant blowout after being shot in the chest with a paintball pellet.

Chinese scientist creates a frog smaller than a pea.

Best way to keep your digits warm while smoking.

Colorado woman saved from flying bullet by her cell phone.

10 most depressing U.S. states to live in.

Woman attempts to rob St. Louis White Castle drive-thru style.

Let's bake a rainbow in a jar, ok?

Rockrollin' academic style.

V.20 No.31 |

news

The Daily Word: 8.5.11

Facebook, assaulting Philly buses, kidnapping babies, and weasels planning for the future

The Daily Word

Rio Rancho bank robber still on the loose.

Gunmen shoot up Phillu bus.

Mark Zuckerberg's sister leaves Facebook.

Officials kidnap babies in China.

Head of India's Congress Party had surgery in the United States.

Juno to Jupiter!

Perhaps Obama didn't lose to GOP.

A seven-year-old kid's prehistoric blog.

Mac vs. PC.

South American weasel-like animals plan for the future.

V.20 No.30 |

NEWS

The Daily Word 8.1.11 likes debt ceiling crises, cat hoarders, thieving Spongebobs, Loch Ness monsters, and more.

The Daily Word

White house and congressional leaders craft a debt ceiling plan.

Albuquerque has its own cat hoarder.

Rio Grande water declared drinkable again.

Fall television previews: NBC; CBS; ABC; FOX; Breaking Bad.

Mannequins are about to get a whole lot more life-like. I'm seeing some more horror and/or comedy movies in our future.

Dwight Schrute on inspirational quotes.

Crop circle pranksters go all high-tech on our corn fields.

Beckhams described as setting “bad example” for having too many children.

Skeleton of man missing since 1984 found in a Louisiana Bank chimney.

Loch Ness Monster sighting.

Man disguised as Spongebob Squarepants robs 7-11 in West Palm Beach.

Apparently pole-dancing is the latest fitness craze for Chinese men.

Who wore it better? 'Melo or Shaq?

The Oatmeal on the current state of the web.

V.20 No.29 |

NEWS

The Daily Word 7.25.11: NFL lockout; Chupacabras; Fake Apple stores; Rebecca Black

The Daily Word

NFL players and staff agree on deal to end lockout.

Texas teen allegedly shoots and kills a chupacabra.

China is shutting down all the fake Apple stores.

Oh no, no, we are not done talking about Rebecca Black.

Christmas in July: Santas from across the globe compete in obstacle course.

Why is insolence so funny?: Blogger David Thorne on Missy the missing cat.

How to eat Cheetos without getting orange crap all over your fingers.

NASA releases book for visually impaired to learn about the moon.

Funky Aquariums.

The Oatmeal: Bobcactus.

16 pictures humorously depicting expectations vs. reality.

V.20 No.26 |

news

The Daily Word: 7.1.11 - Fire Updates, Spotted Owls, War in Sudan and Bad Clichés

And Justin Timberlake bought Myspace

The Daily Word

Fatal crash shut down 125 southbound last night.

Last night's Bosque fire intentionally set by trespassing teen.

Las Conchas fire still swallowing acres.

Auto updates on the Dominique Strauss-Kahn trial.

Another candidate vies for Republican nomination.

Someone nails down the secrets of Brad Pitt's acting.

Justin Timberlake buys Myspace.

War speeds toward Sudan.

Fish and Wildlife Service releases plan to save Spotted Owl. Finally.

The Oatmeal's take on smartphones.

Do you know about Google Voice Search?

Poets name the worst clichéd phrases.

V.20 No.24 |

NEWS

The Daily Word 6.20.11: Fires, Green Lantern, Robot Pizza, Skinny Dippers, and Harry Potter.

The Daily Word

McCain blames Arizona wildfires on illegal immigrants.

Arson suspected as cause for East Mountains fire.

Even space is advertising for The Green Lantern.

Female drivers in Saudi Arabia stick it to the man by driving cars even though it's banned. They even have a facebook page.

They may be smarter than some human children, but dolphins still know how to have fun.

Robot pizza vending machines hit Europe.

Welsh skinny dippers break world record with giant dip.

Man arrested for drunken lawnmower driving.

Bigfoot DNA testing anyone?

The Oatmeal: How to make a restaurant insanely popular.

Harry Potter fans have something to look forward to besides the new movie, check out JK Rowling's mysterious new site set to fully launch on Thursday.

Grandma's cremated ashes still hanging out in Michigan Goodwill.

It may be scientifically possible to create a human-chimpanzee hybrid.

V.20 No.23 |

NEWS

The Daily Word 6.13.11: Shrek Dies; Bugs in Ice Cream, Spiders in Space; 2 Kinds of Lobo

The Daily Word

Shrek the famous New Zealander Sheep dies.

Wallow Fire 10% contained this morning, but may still head further into New Mexico.

Lobos to play in ESPN classic, but you gotta wait until December.

Spiders in Space!!

Diabetic woman sues Dunkin Donuts over sugar in her coffee.

Awesome science gifts that are not just for nerds.

Bean Sprouts sproutin' E. coli.

People go crazy over Cicada
flavored ice cream.

Please don't get your hand caught in the machine that destroys EVERYTHING.

Martinez says 'no' to Mexican Gray Wolf efforts in New Mexico and Arizona.

The Oatmeal: Ten Words you need to stop misspelling.

NSA releases 50,000 pages of juicy secrets.