The hopeless romantic in me is now dead.

Unlike the US, folks in the Philippines aren’t scared of transgender people.

Has anyone seen my eyes? Because they fell out of their sockets from rolling them so hard at this article.

Storm Troopers Got Talent.

I don't know why anyone is surprised that Beyonce performed in North Carolina when she's kind of ignored the LGBT community in the past.

People will no longer be jailed if they aren't able to pay court fines in Colorado Springs.

Millennials are so _________.

“By white men, for white men.”

If you don a sombrero, a fake mustache or utter “Cinco de Drinko” today (or ever) please don't talk to me.

This doctor said the hospital she works at told her not to talk about abortions with her patients.

David Cameron respects Donald Trump. I think we can agree that the UK and the US are in the shitter right now.

This feminist artist makes jabs at famous artists.

Ahoy! The famous Lord Sandwich, lost in the 18th century, is found!

A new world record for the 100 meter dash is set. By a 100 year old woman. Best way to celebrate? Push-ups. This lady is not to be messed with.

We all know that Beyonce's a badass but she isn't the only VIP in her new album. Her music video is comprised of an impressive and talented group of artists.

This little anteater did not just smoke a bowl. Leave him alone.

A significant percentage of antibiotics prescribed in the U.S. are given to patients who—get this—don't have bacterial infections. Drugs are great, but only when they actually work. Continuing to misuse such a powerful resource is resulting in a scary high amount of drug-resistant bugs.

In two years time Mars will say hello to an unmanned spacecraft called Dragon. The first step to Mr. Musk's ambitious goal of colonizing the planet? Only time will tell.

Mutation gene found in Labrador retrievers reveals that they are more inclined to crave food than other breeds.

Despite what Alanis Morissette tries to tell you, “rain on your wedding day” does not constitute irony. It also doesn't have to be a bad thing in the first place.

Mark your calendars for May 6th!

Of course it’s true if you read it on the internet.

YAAASSS QUEEN!

Ted Cruz obviously knows he doesn’t have a real chance at winning presidency.

True life: MTV Cribs is going to be on Snapchat.

Look at this “new” Rembrandt painting.

Hillary just got Berned allll sick, huh?

This interview is FLAWLESS.

This Italian documentary about addiction looks super intense (and great).

Do extreme videos online really affect children?

This local man told the police the dead man found in his apartment had just told him, “he wanted to kill some people.”

How to make a Philosopher’s stone, by Isaac Newton.

Gad DAMMIT, Tumblr, WHY???

If you haven’t already heard, Harper Lee died last night.

The NM Legislature is finally funding the 5,500 rape kits that are on backlog to be tested.

The ‘Hairy Panic’ tumbleweed has taken over an Australian town.

North and South Korea are gunna go to war any minute now.

The Mayor gets called out by a local (former) zookeeper.

In case you need reassertion that the police don’t care about black people in Florida.

This badass kickboxer is teaching Muslim women to defend themselves.

The methane leak has been "permanently" capped.

“Men are just smarter than women. It’s just a scientific fact.”

Teen is arrested for posing as a doctor and opening his own medical office.

Nike breaks up with Manny Pacquiao over his gay slur.

President Obama and the First Lady are visiting Cuba in March.

ABC hires Channing Dungey. Why is this so important? She is the first Black president of a major network.

In people are the worst news: dolphin dies after it is passed around for selfies.

Some noteworthy, strange patents that never came to pass.

People still mad about Beyonce's Super Bowl performance.

There's a video game for that. Help get Leo to the Oscar.

Peyton Manning is facing some harsh allegations.

I bet Donald Trump was that kid who got picked last by all his classmates growing up. I mean, what else would explain his ridiculous actions?

But how does one get themselves $53M in debt?

Saturday Night Live has added 10 more years to my life with the most accurate and hilarious skit.

Whole Foods is my real American Dream.

Lady Gaga pays tribute to legendary prince David Bowie.

Life has never been more clear and I owe it all to this life hack that has changed my life for the greater good.

Ah, yes, another politician with their foot in their mouth.

Islamic State has zero boundaries.

Police officers are people, too.

Holly Holm is like that ex-girlfriend who wants to keep your stuff after a breakup so you’ll keep coming back.

Watch Channing Tatum slay this lip synching battle!

I’m just going to casually drain my bank account buying powerball tickets and regret my prior life choices when I don’t win.

South African Olympian Oscar Pistorius has been found guilty of manslaughter for the fatal shooting of his girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp.

The Navy is searching for a missing pilot after two jets crashed into the Pacific Ocean.

A woman in Blackstone, Mass., was arrested after the remains of three infants were found in her home.

Sorry, Mr. President. I was expecting Beyoncé.

Around 250,000 people in Virginia will lose their health insurance at the end of November.

Rebel Donut is going to be featured on the show “Donut Showdown” tonight on the Cooking Channel!

A crafty thief used her kid as she stole a credit card, then proceeded to give herself the royal treatment with a shopping spree.

A woman and her 2-year-old son are on the mend after two dogs brutally attacked them.

On comparing Albuquerque violence to other cities …

Zeus, the world's tallest dog, passed away this week. RIP big guy.

I've never understood people's obsession with rap-rave group Die Antwoord. While I can appreciate them repping Cape Town and the culture therein, their music just never sat well with me, and still doesn't. A friend responded to this by saying “you just don't get it.” Maybe that's so. But for those that do get it, I'm sure you'll be ecstatic (or a little giddy) to know their new record (Donker Mag) comes out on June 3. So mark them calendars. The group has also shared a video for album track “Pitbull Terrier,” which you can watch below. PS: It's kind of graphic and, but what else do you expect from them?

I never liked Rilo Kiley, but I always loved the country-twinged aesthetic that singer-songwriter Jenny Lewis pursued on her solo material. It had a sort of grittiness and longing that I always felt RK seriously lacked. Now the songstress is releasing a new record on July 29, titled The Voyager. After the brilliance that was Acid Tongue, I'm sure this one will be a poignant and enchanting effort. You can read more details, including the tracklist, over at Rolling Stone.

It's no secret this past year was partially owned by Robin Thicke, as his single “Blurred Lines” was everywhere and anywhere that had speakers and a sound system. Not that that's bad. It's a good song. And now, Thicke is set to release a new album on July 1, though the title and tracklist haven't been revealed. The only indication of the new record's sound is the track “Get Her Back,” which Thicke debuted at the Billboard Music Awards. You can watch that performance below, and keep an ear out for news on that upcoming record. Who knows? 2014 may also be his year.

It's a Destiny's Child reunion! Well, kind of. Kelly Rowland and Beyoncé appeared on a Michelle Williams song from her upcoming album Journey to Freedom. The track features Solange, as well. Titled “Say Yes!,” it's a remix of a Nigerian gospel track (“When Jesus Says Yes”) and though it's not the most excellent ditty, it's nice to hear these women back together. I don't know about you, but I'm tired of Beyoncé solo. Destiny's Child needs to make a full comeback, am I right? Head to MissInfo to hear the tune.

While I'm not a huge fan, I appreciate The Knife. Several songs in their catalog have struck my fancy, from their oft-referenced “Heartbeats” to “Pass This On.” But my interest fizzled over the years. However, the group is still going strong … at least strong enough to release reworked versions of various tracks from their catalogue. Shaken-Up Versions hits the public in the face on June 17, so keep a lookout. You can also view the video for the “shaken-up” version of “Without You My Life Would Be Boring” below.

What better way to celebrate the mark you've made on the music industry than by reissuing the material that catapulted you to stardom? That's what Bon Jovi plans on doing. The band is set to reissue a large amount of their catalog, and that starts with 1988's New Jersey, which hits stores (again) on July 1. That album had such notable hits as “Bad Medicine” and “I'll Be There For You.” The reissue will include deluxe editions that have bonus material and whatnot. For more details, head to Rolling Stone.

I've always loved M.I.A. Granted, MAYA wasn't her best album, but I had hopes for Matangi. And that record proved to be a world-born effort of a Sri Lankan rapper still fighting to be heard and still pursuing controversial material with the swagger of a soldier and an aesthetic of a cut-and-paste artist. Now she's released a video for Matangi-track “Double Bubble Trouble,” which features 3D-printed guns, kids of varying cultures and lots of color. You can give it a looksie below.

Talk about a match made on Earth. Lorde and Bright Eyes' Conor Oberst were paired up in an artistic conversation for The New York Times. The duo talked about their writing styles, their processes, backlash and whatnot. You can read that here.

I'm a-gonna be honest. The only reason I clicked the link for the following video was because the folks over at A.V. Club provided the headline: “Mat Devine’s Wrongchilde channels John Hughes on a new single.” If you say someone channels John Hughes, I'm there. I, like most people my age or older, grew up on Hughes' films, and I have to say their assumption is fairly accurate with the '80s imagery (Karate Kid, anyone?), colorific exploration and, of course, the synth-heavy track. And yes, I know Karate Kid wasn't by Hughes, but we're talkin' about the '80s, man. Like, get it? Anyway, you can listen to Wrongchilde's “Gold Blooded” below.

Lastly, Richard Reed Parry, one of the many members of Arcade Fire, is releasing his own record (titled Music for Heart and Breath) on June 9, which is right around the corner. The multi-instrumentalist will have such guests as the Kronos Quartet, Nico Muhly and Bryce Dessner of The National. So keep your eyes and ears open, and for more info on it, head over to Pitchfork.

KAFB could be fined 10,000 dollars per day if they don't start cleaning up the jet fuel spill.

The DOJ's first community meeting was a bumpy ride.

Beyonce took a picture of a New Mexico highway sign.

Police have charged a third man, a Lobo running back, for his suspected role in a gang rape.

In the tradition of "Kim Jong-Il looking at things", Kim Jong-Un is surrounded by people taking notes.

"As women age, they are worth less and less" and other bits of marital wisdom from the Chinese government.

How to keep crickets in a box.

What is a photocopier?

Cliven Bundy's dispute with BLM has drawn wackos from far and wide to his realm of Nevada.

The Army has forbidden soldiers to wear toe shoes.

Runaway beer blimp.

A beer mile.

Donald Sterling's girlfriend has a weird visor.

Toronto mayor Rob Ford's story as a TV show.

Since last week's Rooster Roundabout, we lost one of rock 'n' roll's truest gods … Mr. Lou Reed. I can't speak for others, but he had a profound effect on how I listen to music, and he showed the immense beauty that exists when poetry and rock meld together seamlessly. It's a practice few can master. And no one did it like Reed. You can read the obituary his wife, Laurie Anderson, wrote here. This one's for you, Lou.

According to the folks over at Pitchfork, Beck has signed with Capitol Records and will be releasing a new album (Morning Phase) in February 2014. This has been sort of a long time coming, as his last full-length release was back in 2008, and it wasn't one of his best. They also stated that a good amount of personnel on this new record worked with Beck on 2002's Sea Change, so this should be interesting.

Okay, I'm obviously playing favorites at this point, but I can't help it. Savages is still very much on my radar with their stellar release Silence Yourself. And now they've come out with a new video for album closer “Marshal Dear,” one of the best tracks on the album. Then again, all of the tracks on the album are fantastic. Okay, okay … I'll stop gushing. Just watch the animated, conceptually war-torn video.

Oh those relentless psych-garage rockers! First Ty Segall and now Thee Oh Sees. The latter band is coming out with a third Singles Collection that's scheduled to drop on Nov. 26. They've also made the track “What You Need” available, so get those boomboxes (assuming you still got one) prepared for this probably-pretty-good compilation.

James Blake has one of those magnetic voices that just needs to be heard. It operates on a wavelength that mixes beautiful tones with a soulful prowess rarely seen in male vocalists. Maybe that's why Blake won the 2013 Barclaycard Mercury Prize for his album Overgrown. For those who don't know, the Mercury Prize is given once a year for the best British or Irish album. Past winners include Primal Scream, PJ Harvey and Antony & The Johnsons.

Dancing at numerous parties in Austin, Texas, it was natural to stumble upon Calle 13, a Puerto Rican outfit who've been steadily releasing albums for years to much acclaim. They've also garnered 19 Latin Grammies. Not bad, eh. Now the group has announced a new single that'll hit the streets on Nov. 13, and a new album that will come out in March, though they've stated that they plan on releasing it independently. So we'll see how that goes. You can hear their awesome track “Atrevete te te” below.

Lady Gaga has unleashed another derivative disco pop-infused club track, titled “Venus,” to the masses. Can we not have a little time to digest the last one, Gaga? Sheesh. Either way … the track is now available for listening via the world wide web. Gaga's ARTPOP is slated for a Nov. 11 release, so keep that pocket change jingling.

Devendra Banhart came out with a substantial release this past year (Mala). It was a release that showed him recycling his worldly sentiments and regurgitating them in a sonically forward-moving motion. Now Banhart has released a music video for the track “Für Hildegard Von Bingen.” You can view that below.

A week ahead of the release of The Marshall Mathers LP2, Eminem has shared his collaborative track with Rihanna, titled “The Monster.” If the song isn't a groundbreaking attempt to boast marketable partnerships, it's at least an okay iteration of Eminem's prowess as a rapper. And at this point, can we hope for anything more? [Editors Note: By the time this was scheduled to go up, Eminem also made his collaboration with Kendrick Lamar available, so you can hear that as well.]

Oh how relentless this Beck guy is … after his last album was released in 2008 (with production duties handled by Danger Mouse), he kind of laid low (minus a sheet music album). That is until he started releasing tracks early this summer, including “I Won't Be Long.” Now Beck has shared a new song, titled “Gimme.” And this one sounds more in tune with the work he provided on The Information, which can be good or bad, depending on what version of Beck you like. Though none of these songs will be on Beck's upcoming LP.

I was never that big a fan of Islands, until I heard last year's A Sleep and A Forgetting. But judging from one of the first songs made available from Nick Thorburn's latest work, “Wave Forms,” this might be something worth looking into. Pitchfork is currently streaming the album (titled Ski Mask) in full, or you could just get your behind to the store and buy it because it came out this week.

Not to make comparisons, but I'm gonna go ahead and say it. I knew I liked Solange Knowles better than her sister (of Beyoncé fame) when I heard her record, Sol-Angel and the Hadley St. Dreams. While it wasn't groundbreaking, it showed that she had more of an old school bent. She's released some stuff since, including a new video for her track “Lovers in the Parking Lot,” from her True EP. You can check it out below:

Seventeen years in the making … Okay, well, maybe they didn't spend that whole time working on the album. But Mazzy Star's upcoming release, Seasons of Your Day, drops next week, but thanks to folks over at The Guardian, you can hear it in its entirety.

I have to admit that while I don't like Britney Spears personally (not that I've met her or anything), some of her songs were markers of very specific times in my adolescence and so on. So it's not too much of an understatement to say that I still follow her career (kind of). But after Spears' latest single “Work Bitch” was leaked online, the pop star and former train-wreck decided to release it a day early.

Following Ian Curtis' suicide, he became sort of this mystical figure/poet that left the world with a handful of interesting and thought-provoking lyrics from his work with Joy Division. Now those lyrics and some previously unseen notebooks are going to be compiled into a book, titled So This Is Permanence. According to Faber Social, the book is scheduled to be published in spring 2014.

I'm sure people are winding down from the rhythmic dance party that was Daft Punk's single “Get Lucky” from their latest LP, Random Access Memories. But get your feet ready for one more spin on the floor because Daft Punk has shared the video for their second single “Lose Yourself To Dance,” which also features Pharrell and Nile Rodgers.

Allow me to wax romantic about Bass Drum of Death's recent self-titled LP. The record was a garage-psyche-punk gem. So I was delighted to find out this week that the band came out with a video for their track “Bad Reputation.” Though I should warn that the video is probably NSFW.

Thanks to the folks over at NME, you can now watch Nirvana play their fantastic track “Scentless Apprentice” on MTV's “Live and Loud.” The footage was originally unavailable, but has been released with the 20th anniversary reissue of In Utero.

President Obama and congressional leaders try one more time to make a plan for the fiscal crisis.

Los Lunas police look for leads in Christmas Walmart theft.

Entertainment 2012: The year that nothing really great happened.

Thanks to Pepsi you could join Beyonce on stage at the Super Bowl!

Old temple and ritual vessels found in Tel Motza, Israel.

The fate of two pit bulls in Santa Fe, who fatally mauled a chihuahua, was be decided in court.

I now present, for your viewing pleasure, Kevin Bacon made out of bacon.

It looks like Kate Winslet is headed to space.

The Dark Knight Rises was among the most pirated films of 2012.

Bad lip reading turns a One Direction song into a really awesome trailer for a foreign thriller film.