deflategate


V.24 No.18 | 04/30/2015

news

The Daily Word in radiation fines, poop-free beards and Deflategate

The Daily Word

It’s Wednesday, May 6,

And an “abstinence only” high school’s student population is suffering from a chlamydia outbreak.

No, beards don’t naturally have poop in them, (ahem, Constance).

Oh, hey, remember Deflategate? It’s back.

One employee has been released from the hospital and another remains critical after an accident at Los Alamos National Labs.

New Mexico cattle have been mysteriously disappearing. Probably stolen by rustlers. I mean, aliens. Obviously, aliens.

A rapist on probation was thrown back into jail after it was discovered he owned a copy of the “Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” DVD.

And the Department of Energy has agreed to pay the state of New Mexico $73 million dollars in fines following a radiation leak at the WIPP underground waste facility.

Have a great day!

V.24 No.6 |

news

The Daily Word in courtroom Deflategate, a severed nose and Harvard sex

The Daily Word

Aviation authorities have released data concerning TransAsia Airways Flight 235, which crashed on Wednesday, leaving 35 people dead, 15 injured and 8 missing.

Pro-Russia rebels and Ukraine have agreed on a humanitarian corridor to evacuate civilians.

A 6-year-old boy's family conspired to have him kidnapped to teach him not to be “too nice” and alert him of “stranger danger.”

Apparently, jokes about Deflategate are not appropriate during a murder trial.

Harvard University updated a school policy to include a “clear prohibition” against professors and undergraduate students doing the nasty.

Taxes: It's that time of year, y'all. So obviously, the state of New Mexico released their “At Risk” audit list to point out which agencies have missed their audit deadlines.

Belen Middle School basketball coach Frankie Griego, who was accused of having an inappropriate relationship with a 10th-grader, committed suicide.

A woman who is accused of assaulting a peace officer has made it onto the state's most-wanted list.

Hey y'all, “Better Call Saul” starts this Sunday! Read our interview with Café Lush owner Tom Docherty, whose restaurant appears in the premiere episode.

A man from Caracas, Venezuela, has undergone several procedures (including having his nose cut off) to look like a villain from Captain America. Warning: These photos are graphic, ewwwwwww.

V.24 No.3 |

news

The Daily Word In Space Camp, Fake Babies and Becoming President

The Daily Word

It’s Wednesday! How are you? Have you been getting enough sleep and drinking enough water? Don’t get too worried about all the stuff you worry about, because it will all work out. Probably. Just take a deep breath, read these mostly uplifting stories, and remember that you are important and people love you.

The fake baby in American Sniper was snubbed at the Golden Globes. RUDE.

Space camp. SPACE CAMP! WE HAVE A SPACE CAMP!

People who care about sports are freaking out about the deflated footballs used during the Patriots game.

Eight of the 43 presidents of the United States never went to college! TAKE THAT, DAD!

Your daily proof that dogs are real life angels.

TLC has created a Kickstarter to help finance a new album.

The highest paid Youtube star is a mysterious woman who clearly loves nail art and opens Disney toys.