In case you didn’t know (and until a few minutes ago, I sure didn’t), the Vatican will cease to exist in right around 11 hours (as of this writing). A little history: Back in 1917, The Blessed Virgin Mary appeared to three shepherd children in Portugal. She hung out with them for six months and allegedly imparted to them a series of prophecies known as “The Three Secrets of Fatima.” Over the years, the secrets were revealed by one of the children, Lúcia Santos. The first “secret” was that there’s a place called Hell and it’s full of people on fire. (OK, not so much of a secret.) The second secret was that Russia should embrace Communion, and if they don’t there will be a Second World War. (There was, of course, but I don’t know how much it had to do with Russia’s rejection of Catholicism.) The third secret was allegedly revealed in 2000. It contained a bunch of gobbledygook about angels, flaming swords, soldiers and some kind of “cork-tree.” The church said it was a dead-on prediction about the failed assassination attempt on Pope John Paul II. The third secret has always been somewhat controversial, however, with a lot of Fatima believers saying that the Holy See covered up the real secret, which probably had something to do with the apostasy of the Vatican. Sure enough, The Fatima Movement has all sorts of fun info on how the Catholic Church is now entirely Satanic and engaged in a massive cover-up. According to the text of Lúcia’s “real” third secret, the Vatican will be destroyed sometime tonight unless the cornerstone of St. Peter’s Tomb is removed and transferred to Portugal, so that country can serve as the new seat of the Catholic Church. So far, the Vatican hasn’t announced any sort of move, so it’s looking like a goner. While you wait for the fireworks, scroll down the web page for The Fatima Movement and you’ll get all sorts of awesome Pope-hating rhetoric, including “Vatican II: Mass Destruction” T-shirts, badly Photoshopped pics with mushroom clouds hovering over Rome and a countdown clock to the destruction of the Vatican!