I don't know why anyone is surprised that Beyonce performed in North Carolina when she's kind of ignored the LGBT community in the past.

People will no longer be jailed if they aren't able to pay court fines in Colorado Springs.

Millennials are so _________.

“By white men, for white men.”

If you don a sombrero, a fake mustache or utter “Cinco de Drinko” today (or ever) please don't talk to me.

This doctor said the hospital she works at told her not to talk about abortions with her patients.

David Cameron respects Donald Trump. I think we can agree that the UK and the US are in the shitter right now.

This feminist artist makes jabs at famous artists.

Conrad Murray, the doctor who was convicted for playing a role in Michael Jackson's death, was released from jail this morning.

Rock legend Lou Reed died yesterday in New York at the age of 71.

Four inmates escaped an Oklahoma jail by fleeing through a maintenance hatch in the shower.

Police in Phoenix, Ariz., think loud dog barks might have caused a man to kill four of his neighbors, two dogs and then himself.

Mingdong Chen, accused of stabbing a woman and her four children in Brooklyn, will be arraigned this morning on murder charges.

New Mexico professor Dr. Henry Oh, Ph.D, receives prestigious “Master Teacher of Honor” award.

Christopher Chase went on a shooting rampage on Saturday in Albuquerque, which left several officers wounded.

Apparently Somali pirates are frightened by Britney Spears' hit songs.

U.S. Justice Department announces it will investigate APD.

APD officer accused of encouraging neighbors to brawl to settle a dispute.

Smoking is dumb for you.

Best prank ever. By which we mean freaking scariest.

Napping baby art.

San Juan County inmates nearly riot over lack of milk at breakfast.

That Facebook privacy notice everyone's posting won't help you at all.

Bigfoot DNA results. Finally.

Albuquerque Authorities name their baby rhino Chopper rather than Bonbornio.

Scared red panda.

PETA gave Miley Cyrus a pig for her birthday. She didn't get it.

Fiona Apple cancels a tour to spend time with her dying pit bull, Janet.

L.A. might ban circuses from having pachyderms. (Also, best Primus song.)

Worst logos ever.

Happy birthday, Bruce Lee and Jimi Hendrix.

Egypt's high court orders that its parliament be dissolved.

Officers stumble across starving horses while looking for a man with a gun.

APD used stun guns, bean bag rounds and a police dog in the arrest of a 60-year-old man. Judge says: Pay up.

"Game of Thrones" sorry about using President Bush's head in scene about heads on pikes.

When is it OK to shoot someone in Albuquerque?

Drake and Chris Brown maybe got in a fist fight at a NY club, say police.

State's paying too much in jail and prison contracts.

The flavorful space between fresh and rotten.

Lara Croft to be put through harrowing attempted gang rape in Tomb Raider reboot so male players will feel compelled to protect her.

After a series of workers who make Apple products committed suicide, the company attempted to improve conditions. Yesterday, another worker committed suicide.

We're going to spy on Africa more.

Wine glass chess set makes for classiest drinking game ever.

Movies for women turn huge profits. So why doesn't Hollywood want to make those films? asks Meryl Streep.

Burger King's bacon sundae.

Ditch your car, city-dweller, and buy this folding pod on wheels.

Snowstorm coming.

Doug Vaughan pleads guilty.

Jail guards arrested after beating an inmate and then covering it up, according to a criminal complaint.

Jerome Block, Jr. on house arrest.

Druids say the solstice ritual yielded good omens.

Racist ad for Chinese restaurant in Dubai.

16-hour roasted Christmas goose recipe.

Best fails of 2011.

George H.W. Bush backs Mitt Romney.

Ron Paul storms out of CNN interview.

House caves on payroll tax deal.

The next thing to worry about: weaponized bird flu.

Texas drought results in mistletoe shortage.

How Best Buy is ruining Christmas.

The 16 worst Christmas specials of all time.

Chicago Cardinal Francis George under fire for comparing gay-rights movement to the Klan.

LGBTers say sorry to Amy Koch for wrecking her marriage.

Elizabeth Edwards dies after a six-year battle with cancer.

Obama is defending his agreement to extend the Bush-Era Tax Cuts.

4chan splinter group Anonymous is attacking enemies of Wikileaks.

Wounded Army vet accused of stalking member of the Westboro Baptist Church (yea, those guys).

After 7 months in space, the secret X-37B robot space plane returns.

Bonding-out of Albuquerque jails is getting more expensive.

Prison fire in Chile kills 83.

Attempted kidnapping in Santa Fe thwarted.

Republican Congressman tries to crowdsource an attack on science.

GOOGLE'S CHROME LAPTOP WON'T HAVE A CAPSLOCK KEY.

The FBI thinks the new Video Barbie Doll could be used for child porn.

Old Navy sells sweaters with swastika buttons.

Are you a rich jerk who wants to watch first-run movies at home? That'll be $20,000.

Where in America is the perfect place to commit a crime?

Japanese satellite Akatsuki fails to enter Venus' orbit, won't get another chance for seven years.

McDonald's in the Czech Republic is introducing five New York-themed hamburgers.

F/X cancels Terriers. I'll never love again.

Is $3 wine any good?

John Lennon's final interview is released on the 30th anniversary of his murder.

Happy birthday Sam Kinison.

Video of deputy getting arrested for DWI. Priceless.

You can now shoot more bears, and cougars. That's not cool, man.

Oh my god, the deputy getting arrested is just too funny.

Dude shoots other dude, gets no jail time.

Sandia Casino gets hosed for $1.2 million.

Four-year-old can be sued for negligence, judge says.

Killer goat was not sick, just horny.

Halliburton implicated in BP well failure. Surprised?

Somali militants execute teenage girls.

Allen Iverson to play basketball in Turkey.

Pope says Stephen Hawking is wrong, God created the world. God not available for comment.