Because I like to allow my mind to wander into a world where I live in something that resembles an old movie scene, reality is often harsh when I come into contact with it. As in, when I’m forced to interact with strangers. Sometimes not even interact, just be near them.
I don’t mean to be judgmental but sometimes...well, we all are sometimes. This morning, while I tried to stick my head in my book and ignore people, I just couldn’t. The train smelled like makeup and hairspray. Across from me a young woman—a very pretty young woman—spent nearly an hour of the ride primping. How much makeup can one lady put on in an hour? A lot. Oh, and she can pluck her already thin eyebrows too.
To be sure that I wasn’t alone in being grossed out or the only one to find this totally inappropriate, I went to the most trusted source around, the internet. Turns out, not only am I not alone, I’m not the only one to think about makeup on public transportation this week!
I’m not a huge advice column reader, but Slate is pretty good so when I found the transcript of a Slate chat with its columnist Prudence I felt vindicated. Pretty much everyone agreed that there are bathrooms everywhere, so there’s no reason to put your makeup on in public.
So, to the lady on the train, let me say a few things. 1) You don’t need all that powder and whatever else you put on your face, you were pretty before. 2) Hairspray smells nasty, please don’t spray it in a confined space. 3) Two kinds of lip gloss? Seriously? 4) The part where you offered makeup to your daughter, who clearly wasn’t much older than five was really disturbing. 5) I’m sorry I kept looking, but I couldn’t help it (and I kept smelling different things that I—a mascara and not much else wearer—simply didn’t recognize).