Roses are red, violets are blue. If you a take our sex survey, I guess I will, too. It’s really short and not terribly invasive (multiple choice, short answer) and you can even skip some of the questions if they’re too hard. For example, it took me a while to think of a sexy celebrity … just like when I walk into a book store and can’t think of a single book I want. At any rate, I finally thought of one that reminds me of my wife. Maybe I’ll run into that famous lady at a party sometime and be tempted to pay her water bill. One can dream.

Hogs ate a man.

Obama has 99 problems.

Internet addiction is a mental illness.

Hong Kong ferries collide.

Let’s watch some Target training videos.

Joss Whedon is making a S.H.I.E.L.D. TV show.

Loitering teens can wreck your business.

Here are GPS coordinates to a bigfoot place.

Ben Radford gives us a history of religious hoaxes.

Human Furbies.

UFOs are real.

Sexy celebrity photoshop guys.

Tinfoil hats amplify mind control rays.

Councilor Michael Cook says balloons need more places to land.

Burglary is on the rise in Rio Rancho.

Tucanos got in trouble for where they put their signs.

Happy birthday Sting. And Chris Johnson.

Thanks to Nayder and Maliskas for the assists.