“Oh hello. I'm coming to you live, before the final results of the election. Here in the Capitol. The election results are coming in as we speak. I've just been handed a sticky note that reads 'No one voted,' is that right, Jerry? Heh, I voted, that's for sure. I sure did. Don't question me on that.
Oh no. Jerry's left the studio. I hear screaming outside. One moment, I'm going to look out the window. Oh, no. Jerry doused himself in gasoline. Well, he was kind of an imbecile, anyway. Still.
Too bad everyone assumed that someone else would vote, it seems we now live in a dystopia.
Signing off for the last time,
Don't let this become reality. Vote today.