News & Opinion
 Alibi V.16 No.18 • May 3-9, 2007 

Newscity

Really Lazy River

The Santa Fe River declared "most endangered"

On April 18, the Santa Fe River was named America's most endangered river of 2007 by American Rivers, a Washington D.C.-based national river advocacy group. The river, a tributary of the Rio Grande that runs across 46 miles of Northern New Mexico high-desert and mountain terrain, passes through Santa Fe and provides the city with about 40 percent of its water supply. The river has been mostly dry for decades. The declaration was made due to a severe lack of water.

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Thin Line

How to be an American Journalist: Part IDan Rather says it best. “We didn’t do a good job.” On Bill Moyers’ 90-minute dissection of U.S. media in the run-up to military action in Iraq, “Buying the War,” Rather’s shown crying on Lettermen when discussing Ground Zero, saying he’ll get in line where the president needs him to get in line.

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Matie Fricker (left) and Molly Adler
Tina Larkin

News Profile

Service with a Smile

Sex, the Self Serve way

“No!”

We were searching for our KI, which, if LuAnn our instructor was correct, was nestled in the midpoint of the lower balls of our feet. We stood, knees bent slightly, pelvis tipped forward, eyes closed and, most importantly, feet hip-width apart, legs anchored to the wood floor.

“Every time you exhale, roots extend out of your KI and into the ground,” LuAnn encouraged. “Breathe. Feel your roots grow.”

“Now take a deep breath, and yell …”

“No!”

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Ortiz y Pino

Stop the Hammer!

We know who lost the war

David Broder, the syndicated Washington Post columnist, blasted Sen. Harry Reid last week for daring to state publicly that the war in Iraq has been lost. Broder, who apparently doesn’t get out much, avers that Reid’s statement was “an embarrassment to the Democrats.”

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Hark!

Ye Olde News From Week Past

Monday, April 23: Today we found out via a press release from the governor's office that Albuquerque City Councilor Martin Heinrich is taking a leave of absence from his post as state Natural Resources Trustee to consider a congressional run against Leather Heather. Since Wilson won re-election to the U.S. house by the narrowest of margins in 2006, and has since been named in the Iglesias scandal, some folks think 2008 will be the year Wilson's reign of doom is brought to an end.

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Odds and Ends

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Canada—Police in the city of Nanaimo, British Columbia (Bathtub Racing Capital of the World), arrested a man after he was found walking around naked with a swastika taped to his body. Police were called to the scene last Friday by concerned residents. When questioned, the man told police he was “honoring Hitler’s birthday.” He was detained and will undergo a psychiatric assessment. Hitler was born on April 20, 1889.

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Letters

You guys need to tell the pervs who write your crossword puzzles that normal people don't like to stand downwind from stink bombs. The clue for 6 Down this week was “Where not to stand from a strong odor” and the answer was “Upwind”!?!

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