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Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
7 min read
ARIES (March 21-April 19): In your personal chart, the planet Uranus symbolizes those special talents you have that are especially useful to other people. Which aspects of your soulful beauty are potentially of greatest service to the world? How can you express your uniqueness in ways that activate your most profound generosity? If you learn the answers to these questions, you will make great progress toward solving the riddle that Uranus poses. I’m happy to report that the coming years will provide you with excellent opportunities to get to the bottom of this mystery. And now would be a good time to launch a concerted effort. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the coming weeks, I’m afraid there’s only a very small chance that you’ll be able to turn invisible at will, shapeshift into an animal form and back, or swipe the nectar of immortality from the gods. The odds of success are much higher, though, if you will attempt less ambitious tasks that are still pretty frisky and brazen. For example, you could germinate a potential masterpiece where nothing has ever grown. You could legally steal from the rich and give the spoils to the poor. And you could magically transform a long-stuck process that no one thought would ever get unstuck. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Are there any weaknesses or problems in your approach to communication? They will be exposed in the coming weeks. If you’re even slightly lazy or devious about expressing yourself, you will have to deal with the karmic consequences of that shortcoming. If there’s more manipulativeness than love in your quest for connection, you’ll be compelled to do some soul-searching. That’s the bad news, Gemini. The good news is that you will have far more power than usual to upgrade the way you exchange energy with others. In fact, this could be the time you enter into a golden age of communication. CANCER (June 21-July 22): If you narrow your focus now, the world will really open up for you in the second half of October and November. To the degree that you impose limitations on your desire to forever flow in all directions, you will free up creative ideas that are currently buried. So summon up some tough-minded discipline, please. Refuse to let your moodiness play havoc with your productivity. Dip into your reserve supply of high-octane ambition so you will always have a sixth sense about exactly what’s important and what’s not. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The state of Maine has a law that prohibits anyone from leaving an airplane while it is flying through the air. This seems like a reasonable restriction until you realize how badly it discriminates against skydivers. Legal scholars will tell you that examples like this are not at all rare. Laws tend to be crude, one-size-fits-all formulations. And as I’m sure you’ve discovered in your travels, Leo, one-size-fits-all formulations always squash expressions of individuality. In the coming weeks, be extra alert for pressures to conform to overly broad standards and sweeping generalizations. Rebel if necessary. You have license to be yourself to the 10th power. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I propose that you try to accomplish the following clean-up projects in the next four weeks: 10 bushels of weeds yanked out of your psychic landscape; 25 pounds of unused stuff and moldering junk hauled away from your home; 10 loads of dirty laundry (especially the metaphorical kind) washed free of taint and stains—and not blabbed about on social media; at least $5,000 worth of weird financial karma scrubbed away for good; a forgotten fence mended; and a festering wound tended to until it heals. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Philosopher William Irwin Thompson says that we humans are like flies creeping along the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. We literally cannot see the splendor that surrounds us. As a result, we don’t live in reality. We’re lost in our habitual perceptions, blinded by our favorite illusions and addicted to beliefs that hide the true nature of the universe. That’s the bad news, Libra. The good news is that every now and then, each of us slips into a grace period when it’s possible to experience at least some of the glory we’re normally cut off from. The veil opens, and previously undetected beauty appears. The weeks ahead will be the closest you’ve come to this breakthrough in a long time. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Can you guess which European country has the best military record in the last eight centuries? It’s France. Out of the 185 battles its soldiers have engaged in, they’ve won 132 and lost only 43. Ten times they fought to a draw. Of all the signs of the zodiac, Scorpio, I think you have the best chance of compiling a comparable record in the next 10 months. Your warrior-like qualities will be at a peak; your instinct for achieving hard-fought victories may be the stuff of legends years from now. But please keep in mind what the ancient Chinese military strategist Sun Tzu said in his iconic text The Art of War : The smart and powerful warrior always avoids outright conflict if possible, and wins by using slyer means. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): After consulting the astrological omens, I’ve concluded that during the next three weeks, you will deserve the following titles: 1) Most Likely to Benefit from Serendipitous Adventures; 2) Most Likely to Exclaim "Aha!"; 3) Most Likely to Thrive While Wandering in Wild Frontiers and Exotic Locales; 4) Most Likely to Have a Wish Come True If This Wish Is Made in the Presence of a Falling Star. You might want to wait to fully embody that fourth title until the period between Aug. 9 and 14, when the Perseids meteor shower will be gracing the night skies with up to 170 streaks per hour. The peak flow will come on Aug. 12 and 13. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You may have to travel far and wide before you will fully appreciate a familiar resource whose beauty you’re half-blind to. It’s possible you’ll have to suffer a partial loss of faith so as to attract experiences that will make your faith stronger than it ever was. And I’m guessing that you may need to slip outside your comfort zone for a while in order to learn what you need to know next about the arts of intimacy. These are tricky assignments, Capricorn. I suggest you welcome them without resentment. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): My daughter Zoe has been writing some fine poetry these last few years. I regard it as professional-grade stuff that has been born of natural talent and developed through discipline and hard work. You might ask, quite reasonably, whether my evaluation of her literary output is skewed by fatherly pride. I’ve considered that possibility. But recently, my opinion got unbiased corroboration when her school awarded her with the "All-College Honor" for her poetry manuscript. I predict you will soon have a comparable experience. Your views or theories will be confirmed by an independent and objective source. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The critic Dorothy Parker didn’t think highly of Katherine Hepburn’s acting skills. "She runs the emotional gamut from A to B," said Parker. I realize that what I’m about to suggest may be controversial, but I’m hoping you will be Hepburn-like in the coming week, Pisces. This is not the right time, in my astrological opinion, for you to entertain a wide array of slippery, syrupy, succulent feelings. Nor would it be wise to tease out every last nuance of the beguiling vibes rising up within you. For the time being, you need to explore the pleasures of discerning perception and lucid analysis. Get lost in deep thought, not rampant passion. Homework: Each of us has a secret ignorance that’s burning a hole in our soul. What’s yours, and what are you going to do about it? Testify at freewillastrology.com.