Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.
Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
5 min read
Dateline: AustraliaThe Australian Sex Party has been stripped—so to speak—of its official political standing. Party cofounder Robbie Swan said in a statement the Australian Election Commission deregistered the party following a review of its membership. Australian law requires a political party to have either an elected representative in the federal parliament or 500 members to keep its registration status. The Sex Party has only one lawmaker in office, in the Victoria state legislature. Swan admits that is not a federal office, but disputes the AEC’s finding that the Sex Party’s membership has fallen below the 500-person threshold. Swan maintains that the party is comprised primarily of young people who change addresses frequently, do not have home numbers and are more transient than traditional voters. According to the Sydney Morning Herald, the Australian Sex Party was first registered in 2009 and has its roots in the adult entertainment industry lobby group Eros Foundation. Following the AEC’s ruling, the Sex Party can still field candidates, but will not be able to put its name on ballot papers and can no longer receive federal funding.Dateline: FloridaA Pensacola woman was arrested earlier this month for allegedly faking a bomb threat—because she needed a ride. The Pensacola News Journal reports Priscilla Lee Bembow called a US Navy recruiting center around 8:45am on Monday, May 4. She got hold of First Class Chief Petty Officer Charles Brockett and asked if she had reached “the government.” She then told him there was a bomb at an undisclosed location, and if someone didn’t come pick her up from the Raceway gas station on US 29, “shit was gonna go down.” Brockett notified his superiors about the woman, and they contacted 911. Deputies from the Escambia County Sheriff’s Office located Bembow at the gas station. Instead of taking her where she wanted to go, they escorted her to the county jail. No bomb was located.Dateline: FloridaAccording to the Tallahassee Democrat, a would-be bank robber was so drunk he took a taxi to the bank. On the afternoon of Wednesday, March 25, police were called to a Capital City Bank in Tallahassee by a taxi driver who told them a drunk passenger had just stiffed him on a $25.50 fare. After exiting the cab, the passenger went into the bank, saying “I will take care of you when I come out.” When officers made contact with the passenger, 46-year-old Stanley Geddie, he was sitting inside the bank manager’s office looking “very intoxicated and spaced out.” Geddie had allegedly told the manager he had a .357-caliber handgun, was carrying C4 explosives and would “blow this place up” if he did not get $100,000. Geddie failed to follow police commands and was tased. A subsequent search revealed Geddie did not have a firearm or explosives. The cab driver told police he wanted to press charges for the unpaid fare. Dateline: NebraskaEarlier this month, 66-year-old Sylvia Driskell of Auburn, Neb., filed suit in the US District Court of Omaha on behalf of “God and His son, Jesus Christ,” asking a judge to rule whether homosexuality “is a sin or not a sin.” Driskell’s suit named all homosexuals in America as the defendants. According to the Journal Star, Mrs. Driskell’s handwritten, seven-page filing identifies her as an “ambassador for the plaintiffs” and is filled with Bible passages to back up her claim that homosexuality is an “abomination.” Unfortunately for Driskell, that wasn’t enough to convince the court. Last week US District Judge John M. Gerrard dismissed the case, noting its lack of legal grounds. “To the extent that she asks for anything from the Court, it is a declaration that homosexuality is sinful—a question that the Court cannot answer,” Gerrard noted in his decision. “The Court may decide what is lawful, not what is sinful.” Gerrard also shut the door on Driskell filing an amended lawsuit “because it is obvious that amendment would be futile.”Dateline: VirginiaA 23-year-old man was arrested after he posted videos and pictures of himself robbing a bank on Instagram. Dominyk Antonio Alfonseca was arrested 22 minutes after he allegedly used a note to rob the TowneBank in Virginia Beach. That still gave him enough time to upload two videos and a photograph of the note he used to the internet. Alfonseca’s note read, “I need $150,000 bands right NOW!! Please. Police take 3 to 4 minutes to get here, I would appreciate if you Ring the alarm a minute after I am gone… make sure the money doesn’t blow up on my way out.” Alfonseca, who identifies himself as an aspiring rapper, told WTKR-TV in Hampton Roads that he did not rob the bank but merely asked “politely” for money. “I don’t know how I’m a robber because I asked for it,” said Alfonseca. “She could have said no, and I could have left.” Alfonseca also used the television interview to give shout-outs to Michelle Obama, Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga. He is scheduled in court for a preliminary hearing on June 12.