Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.
Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
5 min read
Dateline: Saudi ArabiaA Saudi housewife could face jail time after posting a video of her cheating husband. The video, shot discreetly in the couple’s home, shows a man in a white robe and bright keffiyeh headdress attempting to kiss a female maid in a kitchen. The woman appears to pull away from the man several times. Despite catching her husband molesting the maid, it’s the wife who’s looking at going to jail. Saudi lawyer Majid Qaroob confirmed to London’s Telegraph the woman could face up to a year in prison or a fine of SR500,000 ($133,00) for defaming her husband. According to the lawyer, the wife is being prosecuted under a law that “includes stiff punishment for anyone using mobile phones with cameras or other equipment to photograph others and defame them.” Dateline: MaineWMTW-8 in Portland reports Gorham High School in Gorham, Maine, will no longer hold any school dance, with the exception of prom, because dances have been “plagued by the culture of grinding.” Principal Chris Record announced the policy change in a letter posted on the school’s website. In the letter Record said GHS administration, dance chaperones, some students and some parents have “struggled with the modern dance culture.” Record said “it is by no means the students’ fault.” In an attempt to prove to everyone he’s the villain from the ’80s film Footloose, Record placed the blame squarely on “the dancing they have witnessed on MTV/VHS/movies.” The GHS administration has suggested replacing dances with “more inclusive, safe and fun” activities like a Homecoming bonfire. No word on if the school will try to ban VHS tapes.Dateline: OhioThe Youngstown Vindicator is reporting Austintown police were summoned to a home on the night of Oct. 2 by a man who told dispatchers he was “too high.” According to the police report, authorities went to the 100 block of Westminister Ave. at about 5:20pm where they found a 22-year-old male subject “on the floor in the fetal position.” The man was “surrounded by a plethora of Doritos, Pepperidge Farm Goldfish and Chips Ahoy cookies.” The man allegedly told police he had smoked marijuana and couldn’t feel his hands. A glass pipe, two packs of rolling papers, two roaches and a glass jar of marijuana were recovered from the man’s car. He eventually declined medical attention and has not been charged in the incident. Dateline: ConnecticutAn argument at a funeral led to a stabbing and an attempted escape in a limousine. Family members had gathered at the All Saints Cemetery in North Haven just before noon on Wednesday, Oct. 7, when an argument broke out. Police say 54-year-old Robert Ferrie is accused of stabbing a man several times. Ferrie then allegedly tried to flee in the back of a limo but was stopped near the entrance to the cemetery. He has been charged with first-degree assault, reckless endangerment and breach of peace. The victim was treated at a hospital for non-life threatening injuries. The name of the victim was not released, but a police spokesperson told the North Haven Register, “Everyone involved is related somehow.”Dateline: WisconsinWisconsin wildlife officials have taken to social media to refute an allegation that suggests the State Department of Natural Resources mistakenly included deer lawn ornaments in the last two annual statewide deer tallies. The Department said on Facebook that several residents recently received a letter telling them to remove concrete deer ornaments from their yards by Nov. 1 so they are not counted again this year. “The letter was seemingly written on department letterhead and signed by the department’s deputy secretary, Kurt Thiede. Nonetheless, “this letter is fake,” says the Department’s post. “It was not crafted, nor distributed by [The Department of Natural Resources].” Authorities say deer and other lawn ornaments can stay in place and will not be included in any wildlife counts.Dateline: South CarolinaAccording to police in Spartanburg, a man called 911 to complain his girlfriend would not have sex with him. Patrick Doggett, 53, called emergency services and told dispatchers his partner, Faye Woodruff, “would not give him any ass.” Officers responded to Doggett’s home in the early morning hours of Oct. 6. Doggett explained to officers he had been drinking all day and “didn’t know where he was at,” according to the police report. He is believed to have climbed into bed with Woodruff and requested sex, but Woodruff refused because her grandchild was present. “Fuck that bitch,” Doggett allegedly told officers. He was arrested for public intoxication and taken to the Spartanburg County Detention Center.