Just so you know, when my dad said he was listening to Rush last night, he was talking about Rush Limbaugh.I am a very good driver except for the hard parts, which would include, for example, corners.I play the quitar. That’s what you play when you quit guitar.When I see someone driving heavy equipment like a bulldozer, I like to ask him how fast that thing goes.I would appreciate it if you all would stop calling my house pretending you’re the credit card company.Some people get songs stuck in their heads, I get a jackhammer.I like to listen to classical music when I drive so I can make up the words.I wish I could travel back in time and kill myself as a baby.I was excited to read that you can kill mice by dipping chunks of swiss cheese in coca cola and leaving them along the baseboards. It turns out a mouse wrote that.This morning there were people in the alley speaking an exotic foreign language. I think it might have been Spanish.There are people in Europe who are concerned about my drinking. I know that because I sent them a bunch of weird emails last night.
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