I Am Not Jerry J Sanchez

Fluffy Hairdo
2 min read
I Am Not Jerry J Sanchez
Tom, of myspace fame
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Democrat State Rep. District 14 — 18 of 18 precincts reporting

Miguel Garcia 1,854 100% (X)

Jerry J. Sanchez 0 0%


How does a thing like this happen? I know that it’s probably something as bland as a ballot misprint, but last night as I watched the election results flash across the bottom of my tv screen, I couldn’t help think about all the bad things that a person would have to do in order to lose an election 1854 to ZERO. As his opponent’s numbers increased, while his remained at ZERO, I started to feel really bad for him.

I mean, this is the sort of shattering defeat that could destroy a person’s self image.

Then I got mad. Why didn’t he vote for himself at least? Did he forget to vote, or did he vote for Miguel Garcia? Did he tell everyone at the polling place to fuck off, while he dressed in drag, flung dung at them, and yelled “I am Jerry J. Sanchez.”? Because, honestly, even if he had gone to those great lengths, somebody would have checked the wrong box, right?

When in recorded history have 1800 people ever agreed about anything AND on top of that impossible agreement assumption, then carried out their conviction without a single error?

myspace page offers a hint, with his total of 8 friends, two of whom are Tom and Myspace news, but still, what has he done to his 1800 plus neighbors? And he’s listed as married, so… I just feel sick for the guy. Keep the faith Jerry!
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