I Hate Your Mom

Marisa Demarco
2 min read
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Bad moms are the ultimate villains in the Western world. The media loves them because we love them. Everyone in the United States is some kind of mom expert. “For shame,” people moan. “I can’t believe she abandoned / drowned / ignored / fattened / spoiled / gave soda to / tried to whiten the teeth of / dropped / didn’t buckle in / etc. HER OWN KIDS.”

I resisted momgazing at the woman who added eight kids to her six-child family. Then I accidentally caught the “Today” show interview yesterday morning.

I couldn’t quite figure out what to make of Nadya Suleman. Is it really appropriate to judge this woman for having more kids than it seems she can afford? Isn’t that kind of classist? Should doctors not perform in vitro fertilization on poor people?

The story today is that
she lied about not receiving welfare. How dare she? (But why does she have to paint a financial picture of herself for the world?)

Then pragmatism kicks in. I was raised by a kickass single mom who had a hard enough time supporting two kids—never mind 14. Trying to raise 14 kids, eight of whom are babies, by yourself with no real income seems impossible. Is it child abuse? Who sets these standards?

Or is Suleman like a crazy cat lady, but with kids?

Then again, society hasn’t held the
20 Duggars up to the same level of scrutiny. Is it because they’re religious and maintain traditional family values? The Gosselins with their eight kids are notably religious, too. They make reality TV shows about these people.

Maybe that’s why Suleman wanted to have 14 children: She wanted her own show on TLC.

How bad can it be? After all, Angelina Jolie collects kids. And she’s hot.
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