Return Of The Giant London Rocket Weed Or My Kew To Cut

"They Are Invincible. They Seem Immune To All Our Herbicidal Battering".

rudy carrillo
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3 min read
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I thought the rain this past winter was kind. I watched as it lovingly coated our city and state with wet blessings. But the rain brought something else, as I would soon notice from my garden window. The precipitation precipitated the unkind: Sisymbrium irio, the London Rocket Weed.

London Rocket Weed is a relative of the mustard plant. I know you have seen them. They are everywhere. They are probably infesting your yard as you read this. The plant has small yellow flowers. The seedling looks like a dandelion. Do not let its innocent appearance fool you. It grows quickly, and in proper conditions, can reach up to nearly three feet tall. Though herbaceous, the large specimens feature woody stems that can be up to 1.5 inches in diameter at their base. Pretty stout for a weed that is also resistant to many commercially available herbicides. Oh yeah, London Rocket Weed also features an obscenely long and coarse taproot. This taproot makes it almost impossible to dig up using conventional gardening tools, unless your gardening ritual includes hacking at the ground with a machete.

Though the former elucidation may seem merely to be an aesthetic concern, S. irio is not just an excuse for me to listen to “The Return of the Giant Hogweed” as I try to relate all phenomenological data in my life to this or that 1970's prog-rock anthem. Rather, it's a serious problem for New Mexico farmers and gardeners. The plant is the winter home to a species of leafhopper that carries the dreaded curly top virus. When the weed dies out in mid-spring (it's a winter annual from northern Europe, as the common name implies) it's certain that those same insects will move on to a variety of garden favorites, including chile and tomato plants, transmitting the virus as they proceed. According to the big agricultural school down south, curly top virus is deadly to the state's chile production: the last infestation, in 2001, destroyed between 40-50% of the crop. Plant experts and virologists at NMSU agree that eradication before the plants go to seed, near the end of their lives, is essential.

So, much like the dreaded, invasive, non-native and ultimately carnivorous plant imagined by Peter Gabriel, the best thing to do with Sisymbrium irio is to destroy it. Since it had covered my front and back yard with a thick green accretion, I decided the best course of action would involve sharpened steel. A scythe, gasoline powered trimmer and a lawnmower were the weapons of choice. I reckoned that I was doing my part for the fragile New Mexico economy. I implore you to do the same thing, and urge you on with this portentous line from one of my favorite songs:

“We must destroy them. They infiltrate each city with their thick dark warning odour”…

I don't know about the odour part, but it is an ugly weed to look at. And I like fresh green chile and tomatoes too much to pass up the chance for agricultural, I mean cosmic, justice.

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