The Daily Word In Russians Need More Sex, Gonorrhea Needs A Cure And Every Tyrant Needs A Lover

Adam Fox
2 min read
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Russian Prime Minister Valdimir Putin encourages his people to start having more sex to help a shrinking population.

A football coach resigns after accidentally posting
a naked picture on Facebook.

The Center for Disease Control issues a warning that
gonorrhea may soon become incurable.

A TSA agent
gets creepy with a female passenger and makes her walk through a naked body scanner three times.

Love letters from some of history’s most notorious tyrants. Who knew Josef “I’m as lonely as a horned owl” Stalin could be such a softie?

New Mexico braces with all their might for the fire and brimstone unholiness that is
gay marriage attemps on Valentine’s Day!

A father plays a
pornographic film instead of The Smurfs at his child’s birthday party. Easy mistake.

Trips to Croatia’s incredibly awesome
Museum of Broken Relationships nearly doubles on Valentine’s Day. Wonder how ticket sales compare to Iceland’s Phallological Museum?

Studies show
a homeowner does better in the dating department than a renter.

In Santa Fe, the Senate approves a proposal to impose restrictions on undocumented immigrants getting
driver’s licenses.

Again? Two Columbine High School students are injured in a
campus hammer attack.

President Obama erases $226 million from the
Mars exploration program and my dreams of martian discovery in one fell swoop.

Happy Valentine’s Day, from
André 3000 and OutKast.
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