Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
1 min read
“In other news, McDonald’s released its latest line of breakfast sandwiches, and customers are experiencing a flavor explosion. Back to you, Cynthia.”That’s Simon’s joke. It came as we were discussing this report that the 400-pound, red-haired clown that is the leader of a hostile dietary takeover in America is paying small-time newscasters to mug behind McDonald’s iced coffees.I wonder if this was cause for pause for any of these talking heads. The producer was like, “Cynthia, if you could just hold this beverage while discussing the latest in yellow tape … .” And then maybe Cynthia thought, “My, that seems kinda cheap and corporate and will be totally transparent to our viewers.” But as the blog points out, TV news “is where ethical standards go to die.” So probably Cynthia’s only question was, “Can I get the mocha latte? It goes better with my eyes.”