Boobytraps

You'Re The Next Macgyver. Just Not As Sexy.

Jessica Cassyle Carr
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2 min read
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When disaster strikes, in order to survive you need to be able to fend off the a-holes who are going to want to take your crap. There are obviously many ways to do this, from a whole spectrum of weaponry, to hand-to-hand combat, to barricades, to diplomacy (which is obviously for pussies). But why not learn a much more sly, deceptive and comical way to circumvent the enemy? The well-placed boobytrap designed by a skilled boobytrap artist has the potential to get you out of almost any sticky situation. From the old bucket of water above the door trick to intricate disguises for explosives, the boobytrap may be your key to survival.

Of course, we can't tell you how to rig up your desk, teakettle, couch, TV or whiskey bottle with hidden explosives (that would be foolish of us), but in a survival situation, or to prepare for one, know that these options exist. There are more rudimentary boobytraps that do not involve fuses and charges, ones that may come in handier in the event of a disaster.

Perhaps the world's most loved (or hated) boobytrap is the pit disguised as regular old ground. Imagine the unsuspecting booby strolling along, planning to take your supplies, then bam! He goes down into the pit and is there at your disposal. And remember, sharp sticks at the bottom of the pit are always a nice touch. Besides, the booby should have been warned by the noise trap you rigged as he came upon your boobytrapped territory.

Remember, boobytraps can be your best friend or worst enemy and in turbulent times others may have the same idea you do. Keeping an eye out for boobytraps and knowing how to disarm them is a key skill for any boobytrap artist. Boobytraps can be made from anything, and anything can be camouflaged, so be sure to keep an extra watchful eye. Knowing how to be a boobytrap artist and avoid being a booby just might be your salvation when all hell breaks loose. See you at the party!

Inspired by Boobytraps, Department of the Army Field Manual, FM-31

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