Sure, some majors are likely to land you more money than others, but have you really considered all the pros and cons? Read our guide carefully before you commit to a course of study.
English
Good For: Playing Balderdash; critically analyzing ramen instructionsBad For: Dating attractive and interesting people who misuse apostrophes; changing oil
Business
Good For: Creating incredible new investment opportunities such as derivativesBad For: Conscience-having; midwifery
Engineering
Good For: Lego construction; building race of robot people Bad For: Teaching robot people to love; dinner theater
Education
Good For: Learning about learning; wearing holiday-themed clothes (pumpkin sweaters, shamrock ties, light-up snowman earrings)Bad For: Being educated; misanthropy
Nursing
Good For: Wearing pajamas to work; seeing some messed-up shitBad For: Not being covered in fluids; sitting down
Astrophysics
Good For: Predicting the end of the universe; putting an end to your mom asking, “What did you learn in school today?” Bad For: Watching “Star Trek: The Next Generation” with your non-astrophysicist friends ("Going through a wormhole at that velocity without sustaining a hull breach? I doubt it.")
Journalism
Good For: (If a time machine to the ’70s is available) Investigating evil; speaking truth to powerGood For: (If a time machine is unavailable) Writing stories on the death of your own field; being comfortable with irony
Dental Hygiene
Good For: Free floss; rare opportunity to wear limited-edition Michael Jackson surgical maskBad For: Going through life without sticking your hands in a stranger’s mouth
Theater
Good For: Adding to your velvet hat and feather boa collection; sipping imaginary teaBad For: Nothing. No matter the situation, you can just act like you know what you’re doing
Computers
Good For: Collaborating with engineers on race of robot people; spreadsheets Bad For: 01110010100, am I right?