The leaves are turning, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas and New Year’s are looming. The holiday season is upon us! Hollywood hopes you will take a break during your endless holiday shopping in the coming weeks to stop by the mall theater and buy a ticket for one of the following films.
November 6
The Box Category: Horror thriller Stars: Cameron Diaz, James Marsden Story: In this creepy, “Twilight Zone”-ish tale, a mysterious man offers a financially strapped couple an odd proposition. All they have to do is push a button inside a box and two things will happen: They will receive $1 million, and someone somewhere in the world will drop dead. Disney’s A Christmas Carol Category: Animated fantasy Stars: The voices and creepy CGI avatars of Jim Carrey, Gary Oldman, Colin Firth, Cary Elwes, Robin Wright Penn and Bob Hoskins Story: According to a cursory imdb.com search, this is like the sixtysomethingth adaptation of Charles Dickens’ holiday classic—but the first to feature 3-D computer-generated motion capture technology. Which is, undoubtedly, what Dickens had in mind when he wrote the thing back in 1843. The Fourth Kind Category: Horror thriller Stars: Milla Jovovich, Elias Koteas Story: Here’s another faux “based on a true story” horror movie in which a female psychologist interviews people in a small Alaska town who all claim to have been abducted by aliens. Allegedly the interview footage is real. Allegedly. The Men Who Stare at Goats Category: War comedy Stars : George Clooney, Ewan McGregor Story: This one’s (very loosely) based on a true story as well. But what a story! A reporter in Iraq crosses paths with a loony character who claims to be part of a secret military project to create soldiers with psychic powers.
November 13
2012 Category: Disaster porn Stars: $250 million dollars’ worth of special effects. … Plus John Cusack, Amanda Peet, Woody Harrelson and Danny Glover. But really, who cares about them? Story: The world blows up but good. Pirate Radio Category: Rock ’n’ roll comedy Stars: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy Story: This tune-filled comedy concentrates on an eccentric disc jockey who breaks British law in the early ’60s to broadcast American rock.
November 20
The Blind Side Category: Sports drama Stars: Sandra Bullock, Tim McGraw Story: What’s a seasonal film guide without an inspiring true-life sports drama? Here, a hardheaded Texas housewife adopts a homeless African-American teen and helps him become an All-American offensive left tackle. Planet 51 Category: Animated sci fi Stars: The voices of of Dwayne Johnson, Jessica Biel, Gary Oldman and John Cleese Story: In this CGI-animated toon, an astronaut lands on an alien world only to find it inhabited by ordinary, green-skinned suburbanites who regard him as a monstrous invader. The Twilight Saga: New Moon Category: Horror romance Stars: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner … basically all those people plastered to your 13-year-old daughter’s bedroom wall Story: After the vampire attack that nearly took her life, plain-Jane strange-magnet Bella finds herself falling for another moody young hunk. Spoiler alert: This one turns out to be a werewolf!
November 25
Fantastic Mr. Fox Category: Animated fairy tale Stars: The voices of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Bill Murray and Owen Wilson Story: Wes Anderson ( Bottle Rocket, Rushmore ) changes gears and tries his hand at directing a stop-motion animated adaptation of the classic Roald Dahl children’s book about a too-clever fox battling some angry chicken farmers. Gentleman Broncos Category: Comedy Stars: Jemaine Clement, Jennifer Coolidge Story: From the makers of Napoleon Dynamite comes this equally left-of-center comedy about a teenager who attends a fantasy convention only to learn that one of his ideas has been stolen by a famous novelist. Old Dogs Category: Comedy Stars: John Travolta, Robin Williams Story: From the people who brought you Wild Hogs comes this wacky comedy about two post-middle-aged business partners whose lives are turned upside down when they are suddenly, and for extremely contrived reasons, placed in charge of rambunctious 7-year-old twins! How wacky is that? I know: totally wacky . Ninja Assassin Category: Martial arts action Stars: Rain Story: Korean pop star (and Stephen Colbert archenemy) Rain stars in this style-heavy karate film about … well, the title kinda says it all. Despite appearances, it’s not based on a video game. The Road Category: Sci-fi drama Stars: Viggo Mortensen, Charlize Theron Story: Cormac McCarthy’s Pulitzer Prize-winning exercise in abject depression gets a big-screen adaptation. A father and son wander across the face of post-apocalyptic America trying not to starve to death, get killed or be eaten alive by cannibals.
December 4
Armored Category: Crime drama Stars: Matt Dillon, Laurence Fishburne, Skeet Ulrich Story: A newbie guard for an armored car company gets talked into participating in a $42 million heist. You guessed it: Things go wrong. Brothers Category: Drama Stars: Jake Gyllenhaal, Tobey Maguire, Natalie Portman Story: A young man comforts his older brother’s wife and children after big bro goes missing in Afghanistan. At the very least, this heavy drama will prove that Jake Gyllenhaal and Tobey Maguire are not the same person. Everbody’s Fine Category: Comedy drama Stars: Robert De Niro, Kate Beckinsale, Sam Rockwell, Drew Barrymore Story: A lonely widower embarks on a Christmas road trip to reconnect with each of his grown children in this holiday dramedy. Up In The Air Category: Romantic comedy Stars: George Clooney, Vera Farmiga, Jason Bateman. … George, take a rest, big guy. Give some other poor actor a chance this holiday season. Story: A jet-setting corporate executive whose job it is to fly around the world and fire people finds unexpected romance with a fellow frequent-flyer.
December 11
Invictus Category: Sports drama Stars: Morgan Freeman, Matt Damon Story: Clint Eastwood directs this unusual biopic about South African leader Nelson Mandela. Rather than exploring the whole Apartheid-jail-presidency thing, the script focuses on Mandela’s efforts to bring the 1995 Rugby World Cup to South Africa. The Lovely Bones Category: Crime thriller with a dash of fantasy Stars: Rachel Weisz, Mark Wahlberg, Susan Sarandon Story: Peter Jackson ( The Lord of the Rings ) adapts Alice Sebold’s best-selling novel about a young woman who watches the hunt for her killer from heaven. The Princess and the Frog Category: Animated fairy tale Stars: The voices of Anika Noni Rose, Terrence Howard, Angela Bassett and John Goodman Story: Disney finally adds an African-American princess to its toy line with this Jazz Age New Orleans take on the old fairy tale.
December 18
Avatar Category: Science fiction Stars: Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver, Zoe Saldana Story: A mere 12 years after Titanic , James Cameron comes out with a follow-up, this $100 bazillion CGI-saturated sci-fi epic about Earthbound soldiers waging a war on a savage, faraway planet via robotic avatars. Did You Hear About the Morgans? Category: Romantic comedy Stars: Hugh Grant, Sarah Jessica Parker Story: Get ready for some fish-out-of-water hilarity when a ritzy New York couple sees a murder and is relocated to a podunk Wyoming town as part of a witness-protection program. The Young Victoria Category: Costume drama Stars: Emily Blunt, Rupert Friend, Paul Bettany, Miranda Richardson Story: Anglophiles, get ready for big costumes and grand romance in the epic dramatization of the turbulent first years of Queen Victoria’s rule.
December 25
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel Category: Partially animated musical comedy Stars: Jason Lee and David Cross are back, possibly to prove they have no shame. Story: How much did you love the live-action/CGI 2007 version? How funny do you find the word “squeakquel”? Your answer to both those questions will largely determine your excitement for this family film. For those on the fence, you should know that Brittany, Jeanette and Eleanor—a.k.a. The Chipettes from The Chipmunks 1983 cartoon series—are here now, too. It’s Complicated C ategory: Romantic comedy Stars: Alec Baldwin, Meryl Streep, Steve Martin, John Krasinski Story: A reformed womanizer finds himself dealing with empty-nest syndrome while possibly romancing his ex-wife. Nine Category: Musical Stars: Daniel Day-Lewis, Penélope Cruz, Marion Cotillard, Nicole Kidman, Sophia Loren Story: Joining the likes of such movies-turned-musicals-turned-movie-musicals as Hairspray and The Producers , the stage adaptation of Federico Fellini’s pseudo-biopic 8 1/2 gets turned back into a movie. (Now with singing and dancing!) Sherlock Holmes Category: Historical action comedy Stars: Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law Story: Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s calculating hero gets a serious action-movie makeover courtesy of Madonna’s ex-husband (he directed Snatch ) and the dude who played Iron Man.
