It's been proven that the drunker you get, the more wildly you gesticulate. And no one knows that unfortunate fact better than Riedel, a company that has been manufacturing top-notch wineglasses for 11 generations or so. Enter the “O.” These wineglasses are sensual and sturdy, with a stemless design that resists tipsy tip-overs—and they look and feel just wonderful when cradled in the palm your hand. I like the big, mouthy design of the Pinot/Nebbiolo tumbler, but the “O” series comes in several shapes and sizes that are designed to complement popular varietals like Cabernet/Merlot, Syrah/Shiraz, Chardonnay, Viognier/Chardonnay and Riesling/Sauvignon (each at varying prices). I'll take two of each, please.
Lincoln Wear-Ever 7-Inch Omelet Pan, $24.64
You can't make an omelet without a decent pan, and I'm sick of eating scrambled eggs. This 7-inch Lincoln Wear-Ever sauté pan is NSF-certified (that means it's suitable for commercial kitchens) and features a space-aged material called CeramiGuard II–a reinforced ceramic topcoat that makes for a nonstick, scratch-resistant pan. Even the rivets are coated in this stuff for an uninterrupted no-stick surface area. The base of the pan is a super-hard “3004” aluminum alloy, which promises me fewer dents and quick, even temperature distribution. While you're at the restaurant supply store, pick me up a FirmGrip Straight Peeler by Edge Resources ($4). The soft rubber handle is nonslip and ergonomic, and quite possibly the comfiest peeler I've ever held. Serrated teeth on the peeling edges and a built-in potato-eye-remover make it super utilitarian.
Classic Hardware Business Card Case, $28
Up to this point, my business cards have been relegated to rubber-banded bundles, coat pockets, dashboards and free-floating purse scum. It's time to validate my ascent up the corporate ladder with an honest-to-god card case. Buy me this one. The steel-plated case is durable enough to survive most of my reckless adventures. Meanwhile, an epoxy-coated vintage image of the Parisian skyline gives me an instant mental vacation, and a reminder of what I'm working for.
Notebook, Lucha Libre Matches, $4 Each
This small spiral notebook has cream-and-tan lined paper on the inside and a reproduction of antique Mexican advertising art on the outside. The company that makes it is called Gusano de Luz (www.gusanodeluz.com.mx), and they specialize in all kinds of cool Mexi-core items like papel picado cards, oilcloth notebooks and vintage calendars. I like this particular notebook because it’s small and well-constructed — perfect for jotting down useless factoids wherever I find myself. I also like this little box of stick matches, adorned by a chesty Mexican wrestler and sparkly green and gold trim, because, well, some ideas are better for burning.
A Year Of Flowers, $420 To $1,020 And Up
If you really loved me, you'd spring for a fresh bouquet of flowers to be delivered to my home or office once a month for a year. Just call Peoples Flowers and place a “standing order” for monthly deliveries. Bouquets come in three size and prices ranges: $35 to $50 secures a small arrangement that'd be perfect for my office desk or bedside table; the medium arrangements are $50 to $65, and would probably look great on my coffee table. Large bouquets are between $70 and $85 (or higher), and could make for a stunning dining room table centerpiece. (If I had a dining room, that is. Too bad you can't buy me a house, too.) Bouquets can be built around any number of my personal specifications, such as a favorite color scheme (seasonal), resiliency (low-maintenance) or fragrance (fresh and floral).
