Free Will Astrology

\ May 10, 2018

7 min read

ARIES (March 21-April 19): The Torah is a primary sacred text of the Jewish religion. It consists of exactly 304,805 letters. When specially trained scribes make handwritten copies for ritual purposes, they must not make a single error in their transcription. The work may take as long as 18 months. Your attention to detail in the coming weeks doesn’t have to be quite so painstaking, Aries, but I hope you’ll make a strenuous effort to be as diligent as you can possibly be.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Born under the sign of Taurus, Edmund Wilson was a renowned twentieth-century author and critic who wrote more than 30 books. He also served as editor for Vanity Fair and The New Republic, and influenced the work of at least seven major American novelists. When he was growing up, he spent most of his free time reading books: 16 hours a day during summer vacations. His parents, worried about his obsessive passion, bought him a baseball uniform, hoping to encourage him to diversify his interests. His response was to wear the uniform while reading books 16 hours a day. I trust you will be equally dedicated to your own holy cause or noble pursuit in the coming weeks, Taurus. You have cosmic clearance to be single-minded about doing what you love.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): It’s possible you could pass for normal in the next three weeks; you might be able to fool a lot of people into thinking you’re an average, ordinary contributor to the dull routine. But it will be far healthier for your relationship with yourself if you don’t do such a thing. It will also be a gift to your less daring associates, who in my opinion would benefit from having to engage with your creative agitation and fertile chaos. So my advice is to reveal yourself as an imperfect work-in-progress who’s experimenting with novel approaches to the game of life. Recognize your rough and raw features as potential building blocks for future achievements.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): "Paradise is scattered over the whole earth," wrote the scientific poet Novalis, "and that is why it has become so unrecognizable." Luckily for you, Cancerian, quite a few fragments of paradise are gathering in your vicinity. It’ll be like a big happy reunion of tiny miracles all coalescing to create a substantial dose of sublimity. Will you be ready to deal with this much radiance? Will you be receptive to so much relaxing freedom? I hope and pray you won’t make a cowardly retreat into the trendy cynicism that so many people mistake for intelligence. (Because in that case, paradise might remain invisible.) Here’s my judicious advice: Be insistent on pleasure! Be voracious for joy! Be focused on the quest for beautiful truths!

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): These days, your friends and allies and loved ones want even more from you than they usually do. They crave more of your attention, more of your approval, more of your feedback. And that’s not all. Your friends and allies and loved ones also hope you will give more love to yourself. They will be excited and they will feel blessed if you express an even bigger, brighter version of your big, bright soul. They will draw inspiration from your efforts to push harder and stronger to fulfill your purpose here on Planet Earth.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): One of the advantages you get from reading my horoscopes is that I offer confidential information about the gods’ caprices and leanings. For example, I can tell you that Saturn—also known as Father Time—is now willing to allot you a more luxurious relationship with time than usual, on one condition: that you don’t squander the gift on trivial pursuits. So I encourage you to be discerning and disciplined about nourishing your soul’s craving for interesting freedom. If you demonstrate to Saturn how constructively you can use his blessing, he’ll be inclined to provide more dispensations in the future.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Vincent van Gogh’s painting The Starry Night hangs on a wall in New York’s Museum of Modern Art. He created it in 1889 while living in a French asylum. Around that same time, 129 years ago, a sheepherder in Wyoming created a sourdough starter that is still fresh today. A cook named Lucille Clarke Dumbrill regularly pulls this frothy mass of yeast out of her refrigerator and uses it to make pancakes. In the coming weeks, Libra, I’d love to see you be equally resourceful in drawing on an old resource. The past will have offerings that could benefit your future.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Love everyone twice as much and twice as purely as you ever have before. Your mental health requires it! Your future dreams demand it! And please especially intensify your love for people you allegedly already love but sometimes don’t treat as well as you could because you take them for granted. Keep this Bible verse in mind, as well: "Don’t neglect to show kindness to strangers; for, in this way, some, without knowing it, have had angels as their guests."

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): After meditating on your astrological aspects for an hour, I dozed off. As I napped, I had a dream in which an androgynous angel came to me and said, "Please inform your Sagittarius readers that they should be callipygian in the next two weeks." Taken back, my dreaming self said to the angel, "You mean ‘callipygian’ as in ‘having beautiful buttocks’?" "Yes, sir," the angel replied. "Bootylicious. Bumtastic. Rumpalicious." I was puzzled. "You mean like in a metaphorical way?" I asked. "You mean Sagittarians should somehow cultivate the symbolic equivalent of having beautiful buttocks?" "Yes," the angel said. "Sagittarians should be elegantly well-grounded. Flaunt their exquisite foundation. Get to the bottom of things with flair. Be sexy badasses as they focus on the basics." "OK!" I said.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Now is a favorable time to discuss in elegant detail the semi-secret things that are rarely or never talked about. It’s also a perfect moment to bring deep feelings and brave tenderness into situations that have been suffering from half-truths and pretense. Be aggressively sensitive, my dear Capricorn. Take a bold stand in behalf of compassionate candor. And as you go about these holy tasks, be entertaining as well as profound. The cosmos has authorized you to be a winsome agent of change.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In his 1931 painting “The Persistence of Memory,” Salvador Dali shows three clocks that seem to be partially liquefied, as if in the process of melting. His biographer Meredith Etherington-Smith speculated that he was inspired to create this surrealistic scene when he saw a slab of warm Camembert cheese melting on a dinner table. I foresee the possibility of a comparable development in your life, Aquarius. Be alert for creative inspiration that strikes you in the midst of seemingly mundane circumstances.

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