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Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
7 min read
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Most salamanders reproduce by laying eggs, but the alpine salamander doesn’t. Females of that species give birth to live young after long pregnancies that may last three years. What does this have to do with you? Well, I expect you to experience a metaphorical pregnancy in the coming months. Even if you’re male, you will be gestating a project, creation or inspiration. And it’s important that you don’t let your incubation period drag on and on and on, as the alpine salamanders do. I suggest you give birth no later than July. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Maybe you have had a dream like this: You’re wandering around a house you live in, and at the end of a long hallway you come to a door you’ve never seen before. How could you have missed it in the past? It must have been there the whole time. You turn the knob, open the door and slip inside. Amazing! The room is full of interesting things that excite your imagination. What’s more, on the opposite wall there’s another door that leads to further rooms. In fact, you realize there’s an additional section of the house you have never known about or explored. Whether or not you have had a dream like that, Taurus, I’m betting that in 2015, you will experience a symbolically similar series of events in your waking life.GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The Greek god Zeus had seven wives. Themis, Leto, Eurynome and Hera were among them. Another was his older sister Demeter, and a sixth was his aunt Mnemosyne. Then there was the sea nymph Metis. Unfortunately, he ate Metis—literally devoured her—which effectively ended their marriage. In 2015, Gemini, I encourage you to avoid Zeus’ jumbled, complicated approach to love and intimacy. Favor quality over quantity. Deepen your focus rather than expanding your options. Most importantly, make sure your romantic adventures never lead to you feeling fragmented or divided against yourself. This is the year you learn more than ever before about what it’s like for all the different parts of you to be united.CANCER (June 21-July 22): Here are three of my top wishes for you in 2105: You will have a clear, precise sense of what’s yours and what’s not yours … of what’s possible to accomplish and what’s impossible … of what will be a good influence on you and what won’t be. To help ensure that these wishes come true, refer regularly to the following advice from Cancerian author Elizabeth Gilbert: "You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. That’s a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control."LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Author Robert Moss has published 27 books. When he talks about the art of launching and completing big projects, I listen attentively. There’s one piece of advice he offers that would be particularly helpful for you to keep in mind throughout the first half of 2015. "If we wait until we are fully prepared in order to do something, we may never get it done," he says. "It’s important to do things before we think we are ready." Can you handle that, Leo? Are you willing to give up your fantasies about being perfectly qualified and perfectly trained and perfectly primed before you dive in?VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The fish known as the coelacanths were thought to have become extinct 66 million years ago. That was when they disappeared from the fossil record. But in 1938 a fisherman in South Africa caught a live coelacanth. Eventually, whole colonies were discovered in the Indian Ocean off the east coast of Africa and near Indonesia. I foresee a comparable phenomenon happening in your life during the coming months, Virgo. An influence you believed to have disappeared from your life will resurface. Should you welcome and embrace it? Here’s what I think: Only if you’re interested in its potential role in your future, not because of a nostalgic attachment.LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): "Nothing brings people closer than business," said composer Arnold Schoenberg. You could be living proof of that hypothesis in 2015, Libra. Your drive to engage in profitable activities will be at a peak and so will your knack for making good decisions about profitable activities. If you cash in on these potentials, your social life will flourish. Your web of connections will expand and deepen. You will generate high levels of camaraderie by collaborating with allies on productive projects.SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Deathwatch beetles have a peculiar approach to the mating game. Their seduction technique consists of smacking their heads against a hard object over and over again. This generates a tapping sound that is apparently sexy to potential partners. I discourage you from similar behaviors as you seek the kind of love you want in 2015. The first rule of romantic engagement is this: Sacrificing or diminishing yourself may seem to work in the short run, but it can’t possibly lead to lasting good. If you want to stir up the best results, treat yourself with tenderness and respect.SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Dieterich Buxtehude (1637-1707) was a German composer whose organ music is still played today. He was a major influence on a far more famous German composer, Johann Sebastian Bach (1685-1750). When Bach was a young man, he decided it was crucial for him to experience Buxtehude’s music firsthand. He took a leave of absence from his job and walked over 250 miles to the town where Buxtehude lived. There he received the guidance and inspiration he sought. In 2015, Sagittarius, I’d love to see you summon Bach’s determination as you go in quest of the teaching you want and need.CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Even in normal times, you are a fount of regeneration. Your ever-growing hair and fingernails are visible signs of your nonstop renewal. A lot of other action happens without your conscious awareness. For example, your taste buds replace themselves every two weeks. You produce 200 billion red blood cells and 10 billion white blood cells every day. Every month the epidermis of your skin is completely replaced, and every 12 months your lungs are composed of a fresh set of cells. In 2015 you will continue to revitalize yourself in all these ways, but will also undergo a comparable regeneration of your mind and soul. Here’s my prediction: This will be a year of renaissance, rejuvenation and reinvention.AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): "Sometimes I can feel my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living," says a character in Jonathan Safran Foer’s novel Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. If you have ever felt that way, Aquarius, I predict that you will get some relief in 2015. Your bones won’t be straining as much as they have in the past because you will be living at least one of the lives you have wanted to live but haven’t been able to before. How you will handle all the new lightness that will be available?PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Erotomania is a word for the erroneous fantasies people entertain when they imagine that a celebrity is in love with them. Laughable, right? Just because I have dreams of “Game of Thrones” actress Lena Headey texting me seductive notes doesn’t mean that she genuinely yearns for my companionship. And yet most of us, including you and me, harbor almost equally outlandish beliefs and misapprehensions about all kinds of things. They may not be as far-fetched as those that arise from erotomania, but they are still out of sync with reality. The good news, Pisces, is that in 2015 you will have the best chance ever to become aware of and shed your delusions—even the long-running, deeply rooted kinds.Homework: Send me a list of your top five New Year’s resolutions. I’m at Truthrooster@gmail.com.