Odds & Ends: Penis Piercing; Denture Theft; Amish Sexting; Drive-Through Pass-Out

Odds & Ends: Penis Piercing; Denture Theft; Amish Sexting; Drive-Through Pass-Out

Devin D. O'Leary
4 min read
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Dateline: Australia— A Melbourne soccer player was ejected from a game after he refused a referee’s order to remove a piercing from his penis. According to Australia’s Sports News First website, Aaron Eccleston was playing for the Old Hill Wanderers against the Swinburne Reserves when he received two yellow cards and a final red card removing him from play. A club spokesperson said, “During the first half, our player was struck in the groin by the ball and left the field to receive attention. At this point, the referee became aware that he had a body piercing. He subsequently received two yellow cards, firstly for reentering the field of play without the referee’s permission, and secondly for privacy reasons being unable to prove he had removed the piercing.” The spokesperson noted that, “At no point during the incident did the player of Old Hill Wanderers expose himself to the referee or other players on the field.” Despite playing with only 10 men, Old Hill went on to beat Swinburne 3-0. A subsequent headline on the club’s website announced, “Old Hill Reserves Triumph Despite Cock-Up.”

Dateline: Tennessee— A spokesperson for the Parkridge Medical Center told The Chattanooga Free Times that the body of recently deceased 76-year-old patient Kenneth Ray Manis will be exhumed from National Cemetery after his family learned the dentures buried with him actually belonged to his roommate. Manis died on June 12 at the medical center. After Manis’ funeral on June 15, a Chattanooga man with whom he shared an intensive care room noticed that his custom dentures were missing. Parkridge staff admitted they accidentally took the dentures when Manis’ body was removed from the hospital room. A “petition for disinterment and reburial” filed by the hospital said the missing item in question was “buried with Mr. Manis” because no one knew it belonged to his roommate at Parkridge. The hospital has apologized to all parties involved and will pay reburial costs and attorney’s fees. Officials noted that the dentures were not placed in the mouth of the deceased, but were put in a case that was deposited with other personal effects inside the casket.

Dateline: Indiana— A 21-year-old Amish man is accused of sexting a 12-year-old girl. Connersville Police were alerted to the crime after the underage victim’s mother found text messages from a strange man on her daughter’s phone. The mother turned the phone over to police after the man identified himself in texts and tried to set up a rendezvous for sex. Police found more than 600 video messages, naked pictures and lewd text messages on the young girl’s phone. Connersville Police and Fayette County Sheriff’s Deputies continued to text the man and set up a sting involving an undercover officer. At around 10 p.m. on June 15, the suspect pulled up to the pre-arranged meeting place in a horse-drawn carriage. The suspect was identified as Willard Yoder. Officers say he confessed in a videotaped interview. He now faces four counts of child solicitation.

Dateline: Wisconsin— A man was arrested on his fifth drunk driving charge after a late-night munchie run had him passing out at the drive-though window at Taco Bell. Bryan J. Jens, 27, was charged in Outagamie County Court with felony drunk driving, marijuana possession, possession of drug paraphernalia and driving after revocation. According to the Post Crescent newspaper, police were called to the Taco Bell in Appleton, 100 miles north of Milwaukee, just before 2:30 a.m. on Wednesday, June 15. An officer reportedly knocked on Jens’ window but was unable to wake him up. Eventually, the driver woke up, turned up the volume on his car stereo and started bobbing his head to the music. The police report notes that Jens “did not even acknowledge that [officers] were in his presence.” Eventually, Jens was removed from the vehicle, at which point he began calling a female officer “baby” and “honey.” When police asked Jens to submit to field sobriety tests, he replied, “C’mon, we’re not all stupid here. Do you even need to do these on me? Serious. C’mon.” Results for Jens’ blood alcohol test were unavailable, but Assistant District Attorney Nicholas Bolz told the Post Crescent that circumstances suggest “a significantly high blood alcohol concentration.”

Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.

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