Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.
Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
5 min read
Dateline: EnglandPolice in Canterbury allowed a nude bike ride to take place but took a hard line against “aroused” participants. Around 200 people are believed to have taken place in the lighthearted “protest” to highlight the vulnerability of cyclists on British roads. Before this year’s event, organizer Simon Terry told the UK’s Mirror he was on the lookout for certain undesirable cyclists. “Regrettably, we were let down by a small minority of participants in the 2013 ride who ignored our requests and behaved inappropriately,” Terry admitted to the newspaper. “If you are thinking of coming to the start or finish area, not to participate but just because you like seeing naked girls, the police have been informed and have been asked to remove you.” Terry said lawbreakers would stand out in the crowd. “Should you be aroused, you will pull over to the side of the road and cover yourself or dress immediately.” World Naked Bike Ride events are held around the globe to promote cycling.Dateline: AlabamaAuthorities in Jefferson County are baffled by a spate of mysterious urinal thefts. Just after 1pm on Tuesday, May 27, sheriff’s deputies were called to a Captain D’s outside Birmingham. Inside the restaurant’s restroom, they found flush valves and supply lines to the urinal missing. Investigators contacted other area businesses and discovered similar thefts. A nearby Church’s and an Arby’s down the street reported missing urinal parts as well. In each incident the men’s room raider managed to avoid detection. “I really don’t know what we have on our hands here,” Chief Deputy Randy Christian told al.com. “The first thought would be scrap, but these items would bring very little money. Maybe we have a plumber that is trying to cut his overhead cost, or some nut with a fetish I haven’t heard of. To say this is an unusual theft case really doesn’t do it justice.” Two suspects have reprotedly been detained in connection with the thefts.Dateline: GeorgiaPolice in suburban Atlanta have arrested a man who robbed a Waffle House with a pitchfork. On Friday, May 1, police say a “portly” gentleman wearing overalls and a blue ski mask entered the restaurant and brandished a wooden-handled pitchfork with three metal tines. According to Norcross Police Chief Warren Summers, the man “herded the employees into the stockroom with the pitchfork.” Unable to open the cash register, he picked up the machine and loaded it into a white van parked outside. Two employees ran out of the stockroom and chased the hillbilly bandit. A fight ensued, during which “the suspect was stuck with the pitchfork by one of the employees.” The suspect managed to escape in his van, but was quickly pursued by police. He eventually drove off the roadway and got away on foot. Jeffery Willard Wooten, 49, was arrested just days later in connection with the robbery. Authorities caught up to him in Knox County, Tenn., and say he was recognizable by his brown buzz cut and scraggly beard. And the fresh pitchfork injury to his face. In addition to the Waffle House robbery, Wooten was charged with murder in connection to a carjacking in Knox County.Dateline: PennsylvaniaA total of 41 people are facing charges in what prosecutors call an elaborate insurance fraud scheme involving dead deer. Ronald Galati Sr. is accused of running the $5 million scam out of his South Philadelphia auto body shop. District Attorney Seth Williams said the 63-year-old Galati coached customers to claim they’d hit a deer instead of another car, so the insurance companies would label it a “no fault” accident. No fault accidents pay out claims without raising customers’ premiums. Galati allegedly kept deer carcasses, blood and fur in the back of his shop to convince investigators. Also charged in the racket are Galati’s wife, son and daughter, several insurance adjusters, tow truck drivers, a city official and a police officer. The charges came after a 16-month investigation by a Philadelphia grand jury. According to the Philadelphia Inquirer, Galati is an alleged mob associate and is already awaiting trial for hiring hitmen to kill three people.Dateline: OregonAccording to the Grants Pass Daily Courier, a tattooed man raced into a Southern Oregon convenience store and started dousing himself with Hawaiian Punch Slurpees. Turns out the man was suffering from severe burns and was being chased by two assailants. Store clerk Charlie Bentley told the newspaper he didn’t know what was going on when the man came into the store and filled his shirt at the Slurpee machine. Bentley and another clerk kept the man’s pursuers outside the store and called 911. Police traced the disturbance back to a residence a few blocks away, where a man and a woman were reportedly burned with hot oil during a dispute between neighbors.