Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.
Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
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Dateline: The NetherlandsCabinet ministers in Holland recently decided that driving instructors can trade lessons for sex. The unusual debate came up in a recent parliament meeting. Although prostitution in legal in The Netherlands, Minister of Security and Justice Ard van der Steur and Infrastructure and Environment Minister Melanie Schultz van Haegen addressed the issue after biblically based ChristenUnie Party politician Gert-Jan Segers tried to table the question. The cabinet ministers confirmed that offering driving lessons in exchange for sex does not constitute prostitution, since sex is not being sold. On the other hand, offering sex in exchange for driving lessons would be considered prostitution. So, as long as the driving instructor brings up the idea, and both parties are over 18, it’s perfectly legal now in The Netherlands. Although, as dutchnews.nl noted, the ministers both called the practice “undesirable.”Dateline: GeorgiaA bank robber was at least in the Christmas spirit when he handed over a note demanding money and wishing the teller a merry Christmas. Gwinnett County police said in a news release that a man, later identified as 30-year-old Joshua Henry Harbin, came in to the BB&T Bank in Buford on Monday, Dec. 21. The man allegedly passed a note to the teller demanding money. At the end of the note, the suspect had written, “Merry Christmas.” According to the Atlanta Journal-Consitution, he got away with a small amount of cash but later approached a woman in Atlanta and told her to call police after hearing about the case on the radio. Police say Harbin has cooperated with the investigation and is now charged with one count of robbery.Dateline: WisconsinAuthorities in the village of Brown Deer say an 82-year-old woman called 911 on the night of Sunday, Dec. 20, to report she heard her neighbors chanting “ISIS is good, ISIS is great” while having sex. Police did not immediately investigate but advised the elderly woman to call back if she heard any additional praise for the Middle Eastern terrorist organization. When asked about the incident, Brown Deer Police Chief Michael Kass posted on Facebook that the caller was “maybe taking ‘see something, say something’ a little too far.” Speaking to the New York Daily News, Brown later said, “We don’t want to discourage people from reporting potential terror attacks. But this seems odd.”Dateline: FloridaA 55-year-old woman in Port St. Lucie was arrested earlier this month after she allegedly attacked her husband for farting in bed. WPTV reports Dawn Meikle was in bed with her husband around 3:20am on Dec. 11 when he started passing gas. Meikle told police she started elbowing him to get him to stop. When that didn’t work, she elevated her technique. “Dawn began kicking him and eventually kicked him out of their bed,” according to the police report. The husband waited a few moments before getting back into bed. But evidently, his gas pressure had not eased. Dawn continued to elbow and kick him over his continued flatulence. Meikle’s husband tried to restrain her and suffered a ripped shirt and “several” 6- to 8-inch scratches across his chest for the trouble. Meikle eventually retreated to the bathroom to call 911. Also, for reasons unknown, she set off a canister of pepper spray—which could not have helped ease the odor in the bedroom. Meikle was eventually charged with misdemeanor battery and taken to St. Lucie County Jail.Dateline: VirginiaIf weird news stories have taught us anything, it’s that “911” is a really easy number for stoners to recall. A man in Waynesboro, allegedly called 911 “in a disoriented state” to report he was out of rolling papers. Kyle Dustin Head, 24, told the dispatcher he needed some rolling papers delivered to him. The dispatcher kindly sent two officers to Head’s location. They found him sitting in a parked 2005 Chevrolet pickup truck which “had the strong odor of marijuana emanating from it.” According to a press release from the Waynesboro Police Department, “officers also noticed the leafy green substance on Head’s clothing, the dashboard of his truck, the passenger seat and his right ear.” Head admitted to smoking marijuana and said he thought he had called a friend of his when he was speaking to the 911 telecommunicator. He was cited for misdemeanor marijuana possession and released.