Dateline: IdahoA pair of self-confessed drug smuggling “dumbasses” transporting 20 pounds of weed from Las Vegas, Nev., to Bozeman, Mont., decided to sample their cargo. Unsurprisingly, things went downhill from there, with the pair becoming so paranoid they called 911 to turn themselves in. The Rexburg Police Department in Idaho just released audio recordings of the 911 call made by 22-year-old Leland Ayala-Doliente and 23-year-old Holland Sward early last year. Police say the two men became so paranoid while driving along Idaho’s Highway 20 they thought police were following them in unmarked cars. “Hi, uh, we’re the two dumbasses that got caught trying to bring some stuff through your border and all your cops are just driving around us like a bunch of jack wagons and I’d just like for you guys to end it. If you could help me with that, we would just like to get on with it,” Ayala-Doliente told the 911 dispatcher. The paranoid pot smoker went on to say he saw, “a bunch of your cops driving around in a bunch of civilian cars not wanting to pick us up. I don’t know what’s the deal. I was just wondering if you could help us out and just end it.” Ayala-Doliente gave the dispatcher directions to the vehicle, and police found the two men waiting there with their hands on their heads. “We got caught and we’re surrendering,” Sward told officers, according to court documents. Rexburg Police Capt. Randy Lewis told East Idaho News there were no police officers following the pair at the time of the 911 call. The marijuana the pair had was estimated to have a street value of $16,000. Sward pled guilty last June and was eventually given 30 days in jail and five years probation. In November Ayala-Doliente was sentenced to one and a half to eight years in prison. His sentence was harsher because, according to East Idaho News, he “tested positive for marijuana, cocaine and oxycodone on his sentencing day.”Dateline: AlaskaA man suspected of burglarizing two businesses failed to make a clean getaway after locking his keys in his car. Surveillance video shot Jan. 6 in North Pole, Alaska, a city 14 miles south of Fairbanks, shows a man carrying items from the Forbes Laundry and F & H Fitness to his Nissan Sentra. The man then pulls the car closer to the front door of one of the businesses. Later on that evening, a local cab company named Arctic Taxi was called to help open the door of that car. “There’s pretty good surveillance video there,” Steve Dutra, a chief of the North Pole Police Department told the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner. “It covers the entire parking lot and the highway.” The cab company provided police with the name and number of the man who called them, 27-year-old Joseph Michael Barria. When first contacted by police, Barria admitted to stealing the items from the businesses but later recanted his statement. A police search turned up $3,500 worth of tools taken from the laundry in the trunk of Barria’s car. About $2,700 worth of items—including stereo equipment and a portable defibrillator—remain unaccounted for. Prosecutors have charged Barria with burglary while armed with a gun, felony theft and misdemeanor mischief charges.Dateline: WisconsinCheesehead thieves in Germantown, on the northwest side of Milwaukee, have reportedly stolen $70,000 worth of cheese from a local distribution warehouse. The extremely Wisconsin crime occurred shortly after midnight of Friday, Jan. 22, at D&G Transportation when a 2012 Great Dane semitrailer went missing. Germantown police were quickly able to locate the semi-tractor used to steal the 54-foot trailer and shared a photo of the missing trailer’s logo on Facebook. By 10am that day, a citizen reported seeing the trailer. Unfortunately, by the time police got there, all $70,000 worth of cheese and cheese products were gone.Dateline: KansasA Kansas City man charged with the shooting deaths of three people has married the key witness against him, putting the state’s case in jeopardy. Jackson County prosecutors said in court documents that they believe the marriage was intended to prevent 20-year-old Shellana Victoria Davis from testifying against 23-year-old Joseph L. Nelson under the state’s spousal privilege law. The Kansas City Star reports Davis told police she saw Nelson shoot his ex-girlfriend, 17-year-old Bianca Fletcher, during and argument. He then allegedly shot Fletcher’s boyfriend, 18-year-old Shannon Rollins, to eliminate him as a witness, and then killed his own 1-year-old son because he was afraid the baby’s cries would attract attention. Nelson has denied any involvement in the case. But on Dec. 7, while jailed on a $1 million bond for three counts of first-degree murder, Nelson married Davis. Prosecutors had sought a court order to formally interview Davis on tape before the couple was married, but the marriage occurred before the court ruled on the motion. Now, legal experts say, the state’s case against Nelson could be in trouble. Charges against Nelson were apparently filed based on Davis’ eyewitness account of the crime, and at least one court filing said the state is not aware of any other witnesses to the shootings. Prosecutors say Davis’ sudden matrimonial actions—taken while Nelson was still in jail—were “intentional efforts to hinder the prosecution of a triple homicide.” State law appears to allow Davis to decline to testify against Nelson—although part of the statute says that spousal privilege does not exist in criminal cases involving murder of a victim under 18 years of age. Two of the people killed Sept. 8 were under 18.