Odds & Ends

Odds & Ends

Devin D. O'Leary
4 min read
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Dateline: Sweden

Soccer player Adam Lindin Ljungkvist was given a red card and ejected from a game for “unsportsmanlike behavior” after he farted loudly enough for the referee to hear him. The penalty came during a weekend match between two lower-division Swedish soccer teams. “I needed to fart, I had a bad stomach,” Ljungkvist told
Lanstidningen Sodertalje. “So I just farted. Then I received a yellow card and then a red. I was shocked. It’s the strangest thing I have ever experienced on a football field.” Confused by the ruling, Ljungkvist says he quizzed the offended official. “I asked the referee: ‘What, you can’t fart on the field?’ He replied: ‘No.’” The ref in question, Dany Kako, later told the media that Ljungkvist’s gas-passing was a “deliberate provocation.” Opposition striker Kristoffer Linde of Jarna SK confirmed that he heard the fart. “I was standing a good distance away, but I heard the fart loud and clear. It was the strangest thing I’ve seen on the field, and I have been playing since I was 8 years old.” For his part, Ljungkvist speculated, “Maybe he thought I farted in my hand and threw it at him, but he didn’t say.” Ljungkvist’s team, Pershagen SK, ended up losing the match 6-2.

Dateline: Scotland

According to a Scottish wildlife organization, local birds are turning into name-brand panty snatchers. On June 23 the Angus Glens Moorland Group posted on its Facebook page that some “cheeky birds of prey with a history of stealing unsuspecting swimmers’ underwear are at it again.” Last year gamekeeper Dave Clement was reportedly amused to find a pair of red kites on his estate at Gannochy, located in the Scottish Glens, had stolen underwear and socks from a popular local wild swimming spot to line their nests. The stolen undergarments were discovered after the birds’ offspring were tagged and recorded by Royal Society for the Protection of Birds officials. This year’s tagging operation found four new chicks and some fresh underwear in the Gannochy Estate nest. According to Clement the birds are becoming more brand conscious. The RSPB official who went up the tree to the kite nest this year, “said there were Armani pants and another brand as well as socks, which they must have pinched of the swimmers at the local gorge. It seems they will take anything to line the nest, then lay the eggs on top, and someone must have gone home minus some underwear.”

Dateline: Wales

A hungry seagull found himself dyed bright orange after he fell into an open vat at an Indian food factory in Wales. The bird was apparently trying to scavenge a piece of meat from a waste bin of chicken tikka masala at the unnamed food plant. “They found him after he had fallen in,” veterinary nurse Lucy Kells told walesonline.com. “They grabbed him out and then the rescuer brought him to us. He was bright orange. We have had wildlife covered in cooking fat and clue, but we have never had one covered in curry before.” Unable to clean off the sticky foodstuffs himself, the bird was taken to Vale Wildlife Hospital in Tewkesbury. “Half the staff thought he smelled fantastic and half thought he smelled awful,” Kells told reporters. Despite the fact that the turmeric in the tikka masala dyed the bird’s feathers orange, he was unharmed. “He was just a bit embarrassed,” said Kells. “He does not like spicy food any more.” The seagull, who was named Gullfrazie, will remain at the veterinary hospital until the natural oils in his feathers have recovered.

Dateline: Colorado

Security at the Boulder County Justice Center denied entrance to a man after he tried to smuggle his pet iguana into the courthouse. On June 17 the Boulder County Sheriff’s Office tweeted a picture of an X-ray showing a large lizard inside a handbag, saying, “At the Justice Center only service animals are allowed. No iguanas … even if it goes through the X-ray machine.” Spokesperson for the Sheriff’s office Carrie Haverfield told the
Daily Camera the man was turned away at security. “Apparently he was there with some friends, so he waited outside with his iguana,” she told the newspaper. “Unfortunately, it is not the first time someone tried to put an animal through the X-ray.” Boulder County Sheriff Cmdr. Mike Wagner told CBS-4, “People are just odd sometimes.”

Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.

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