Odds & Ends: Oompa-Loompas And Anti-Vulture Kits

Odds & Ends: Oompa-Loompas And Anti-Vulture Kits

Devin D. O'Leary
4 min read
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Dateline: England

Police who pulled a suspected burglar from a backyard storage shed found some fairly incriminating evidence on the man’s phone. According to London’s
Daily Mail, officers responded to a house in Leicester after a neighbor reported seeing two suspicious men in the garden. Nothing had been taken from the residence, but a backdoor window had been smashed. Dozy Stuart Gibbs, 24, was found hiding in a shed behind the house. Flipping through the suspect’s cell phone history, police located a text message Gibbs had sent to a friend two hours earlier which read, “I’ve told you 20 times—don’t ring me when I’m out robbing.” Prosecuting attorneys noted in court that glass fragments on Gibbs’ gloves matched those from the broken window. In defending his client, Gibbs’ attorney told the court, “He can’t explain the text message, and it doesn’t reflect the situation or his antecedent history.” Nonetheless, Gibbs eventually admitted to attempted burglary and pleaded guilty to a string of other offenses including dangerous driving, driving while disqualified, handling stolen goods and possessing marijuana. In December, he was sentenced to 18 months in jail and given an 18-month ban from driving.

Dateline: England

Detectives in Norfolk are looking for a dangerous pair of Oompa-Loompas who allegedly assaulted a man outside a kebab shop in Norwich. Police say the 28-year-old male victim was left with cuts to his face, nose and lip, as well as two black eyes after being confronted by the two fictional candy makers as well as a man and a woman “who were not wearing fancy dress.” The attack took place around 3:20 a.m. on Dec. 27 in the Prince of Wales Road nightclub area of Norwich, Norfolk. “Police are seeking a group of four people, two of whom were dressed as Oompa-Loompas, who attacked a male on a night out,” a spokesperson for Norfolk police told London’s
Daily Mail. “Two of the males were dressed as Oompa-Loompas from [the Roald Dahl book] Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, with painted orange faces and dyed green hair.” The police spokesperson said it was believed that only the Oompa-Loompas took part in the attack.

Dateline: Florida

Visitors to parts of Everglades National Park are being issued “anti-vulture kits” after the winged scavengers were reported eating cars in the famed swamp’s parking lots. Park wildlife biologist Skip Snow told
The Miami Herald that the birds were migrating as normal, but had taken to ripping windshield wipers, sunroof seals and other rubber and vinyl parts from various vehicles. In order to protect the cars, park employees have been loaning tarps and bungee cords to drivers at the park’s Homestead and Flamingo entrances. Wildlife officials have reportedly tried scaring off the rubber-loving birds, but to no avail. Park Superintendent Dan Kimball told the newspaper complaints about the picky vultures have declined since the anti-vulture kits were introduced late last year.

Dateline: California

A teenage girl and her friend are accused of drugging the girl’s parents so the young pals could surf the Internet. According to police in Rocklin—a city of about 60,000 some 21 miles northeast of Sacramento—the girls spiked two milkshakes in order to skirt the family’s ban on home Internet use after 10 p.m. “The 16-year-old daughter and her [15-year-old] friend were at a house in Rocklin and they say, ‘Hey mom and dad, how about we get you some milkshakes?’ They go to a local fast food restaurant and get some milkshakes,’ Rocklin Police Department Lt. Lon Milka told reporters. According to Milka, the girls loaded the drinks with an anti-anxiety medication before handing them over. The parents reportedly finished about a quarter of the milkshakes before pouring them out because they “tasted funny.” An hour later, the couple “passed out asleep.” Waking up the next morning with hangover-like symptoms, the parents “put two and two together” and called police. The 16-year-old admitted to slipping her parents a Mickey because their Internet policy was “too strict.” Both girls were booked into Placer County Juvenile Hall on suspicion of willfully mingling a pharmaceutical into food and conspiracy.

Compiled by Devin D. O'Leary. Email your weird news to devin@alibi.com.

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