Latest Article|September 3, 2020|Free
::Making Grown Men Cry Since 1992
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Thursday 10 “Thespians” (Showtime 5:30 p.m.) Showtime turns high school drama club into a “Glee”-esque docu-reality series. And if anyone knows how to bring the melodramatic action, it’s high school drama students. “Punkin Chunkin 2011” (Science 8 p.m.) Watching people build machines and then use them to fling pumpkins nearly a mile never gets old. Friday 11 “Green Lantern: The Animated Series” (Cartoon Network 8 p.m.) OK, so that big-budget Green Lantern movie was kind of a disaster. Still, this stylishly minimalist animated version of DC’s space-spanning super cop looks to capture some of the original comic book’s colorful, crime-fighting magic. “Metal Evolution” (VH1 8 p.m.) VH1 gives us the definitive documentary series on the creation and stylistic growth of heavy metal music—starting tonight with the “pre-metal” era. Hard to imagine how they coped before the invention of hair mousse. Saturday 12 “Primeval” (BBC America 7 p.m.) The Beeb’s dinosaur-fighting scientists return for a fifth season. Rage of the Yeti (Syfy 7 p.m.) Cheap Syfy Channel movie starring David Chokachi or hip emo band name? You decide. Sunday 13 Reel Love (CMT 8 p.m.) LeAnn Rimes gets to star in a made-for-TV romance, thereby fulfilling the promise she showed when she played “herself” in Coyote Ugly back in 2000. Cancel Christmas (Hallmark 6 p.m.) Judd Nelson is playing Santa Claus? I can’t decide whose reputation is suffering more by this association. “Ned Bruha: Skunk Whisperer” (Animal Planet 9 p.m.) New AnPlan docu-reality series or wacky, direct-to-video Rob Schneider movie? You decide. “All-American Muslim” (TLC 8 p.m.) I’m sure, in the eyes of the TLC network, being Muslim is no different than being Mormon or being a little person—in other words, ripe for docu-reality show exploitation. Nonetheless, it’s rare to see actual Muslims portrayed on American television, so this has got to count as progress. Monday 14 “WWE RAW” (USA 6 p.m.) USA gives up and just runs three hours’ worth of professional wrestling. “Clue” (The Hub 6 p.m.) The classic board game gets reinvented as a mystery-solving series for young adults. “The Headhuntress” (Bravo 8 p.m.) Ever wonder what the life of premier corporate recruiter Wendy Doulton is like? Me neither. Tuesday 15 “Knights of Mayhem” (National Geographic 7 p.m.) In NGC’s newest docu-reality series, “full-contact jousters endure a week of intense training in an effort to raise their sport into the professional arena.” So … professional jousting. Good luck with that, guys. “MTV2’s Guy Code” (MTV2 9 p.m.) In this weekly, talking-head-style comedy series, top comedians, athletes and entertainers (including Vinny Guadagnino from MTV’s “Jersey Shore”—God help us) teach viewers the “ins and outs of the special code that exists between bros.” So … a half-hour Axe body spray commercial, basically? Wednesday 16 The Bengali Detective (HBO2 6 p.m.) Documentary filmmaker Philip Cox follows chubby, dance-obsessed private eye Rajesh Ji as he investigates multiple crimes (including murder) in Kolkata, India.