Thursday 11
“America in the '40s” (KNME-5 8 p.m.) The music, the movies, the fashions, the trends and the big news headlines of America's wartime generation are explored in this historical special.
Friday 12
Hair Show (BET 5:30 p.m.) This clip-job comedy starring Mo'nique, E-40 and Vivica A. Fox (as Vivica A. Fox) was part of the whole Barbershop/Barbershop 2/Beauty Shop spate of tonsorial cinema that clogged inner city cineplexes round about 2004. Is it that black people are that obsessed with their hair, or is it that Hollywood only knows two things about African-Americans: They listen to rap music and they get their hair done?
Nora's Hair Salon (KASY-50 7 p.m.) This clip-job comedy starring Jennifer Lewis, Bobby Brown and Lil' Kim (as Lil' Kim) was part of the whole … Ah, just read the above cap.
Saturday 13
Alien Express (Sci-Fi 7 p.m.) A ravenous space alien is loose aboard a … wait, let's spin the plot wheel here at Sci-Fi Channel … click, click, click, click, click. … aboard a bullet train. How can you resist when the Alien Chow cast includes Lou Diamond Phillips, Todd Bridges and Barry Corbin?
“Grand Ole Opry Vintage Classics” (KNME-5 7 p.m.) There's a whole lot of pickin' and grinnin' tonight as PBS unveils some classic performances from the seminal TV series.
Sunday 14
“My Kind of Town” (KOAT-7 7 p.m.) If you guessed “crappy summer reality show,” you're correct. This one spotlights a different small town every week where a handful of residents are chosen to compete in “comedic gems and gags for prizes.” Bark! Bark like a dog you slobbering American prize pigs!
“Barbershop” (Showtime 9 p.m.) (Please see the rant of Friday, Aug. 12, for further reference.) This TV adaptation of the hit Ice Cube movie stars Omar Gooding. How bad does the script have to be that Cuba Gooding leaves it for his younger brother to scoop up?
Monday 15
Karol: A Man Who Became Pope (Hallmark 6 p.m.) A four-hour miniseries about Pope John Paul II? Now that's excitement!
“Six Feet Under: 2001-2005” (HBO 9 p.m.) HBO's dramatic downer is put on ice with tonight's series finale. Things start off with a retrospective of the last five seasons.
Tuesday 16
“2005 Teen Choice Awards” (KASA-2 7 p.m.) Hilary Duff and Rob Schneider host. I've said it before, I'll say it again: Kids have crappy taste.
“Tommy Lee Goes to College” (KOB-4 8 p.m.) Former Motley Crue member Tommy Lee gets a reality show–which nominally involves him going to college.
Wednesday 17
“Battle of the Network Reality Stars” (Bravo 7 p.m.) Back in the '70s, we got stars like William Shatner and Lynda Carter and Gabe Kaplan competing in assorted “company picnic” versions of sporting events. Here it is the 21st century, and we have to settle for the likes of Omarosa and Bob Guiney. Never thought I'd miss ol' Gabe, but I do.
