Week In Sloth

The Week In Sloth

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Thursday 12

“Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares” (BBC America 9 p.m.) Good lord, how many different TV shows do we need featuring Chef Gordon Ramsay yelling at people outside a walk-in cooler?

Friday 13

“Drive” (KASA-2 7 p.m.) OK, so, psych . FOX didn’t burn off the final two episodes of this canceled series on Independence Day. The network yanked them at the last minute, consigning them to this plum Friday night timeslot nine days later. Enjoy.

“Monk” (USA 7 p.m.) USA’s wacky detective returns for a sixth season. Sarah Silverman guest stars as Monk’s obsessive “number one fan.”

Saturday 14

Supergator (Sci-Fi 7 p.m.) Giant alligator. Wow, never seen that before, Sci-Fi Channel. Thanks.

Sunday 15

“Secrets of Egypt’s Lost Queen” (Discovery 7 p.m.) Ever gone to a real estate open house just so you could see the inside of that really nice house in your neighborhood? I kinda feel that way when it comes to Egyptian archaeology. This new special, unearthing the long-lost remains of Queen Hatshepsut, who ruled Egypt for almost 20 years while dressed as a man, is historically fascinating. … But I’m really just gonna watch so I can poke around her tomb and see what kind of cool stuff she had.

“Rock of Love with Bret Michaels” (VH1 7 p.m.) Sigh . Yet another dating reality show. In this one, some lucky gal is gonna win the heart of former Poison frontman Bret Michaels. Maybe they’ll get matching bandannas.

“Scott Baio is 45 … and Single” (VH1 8 p.m.) Former “Joanie Loves Chachi” star Scott Baio surrenders to his mid-life crisis and hires a “life coach” to help tame his bad-boy behavior in order to finally earn the chance at maintaining a stable, meaningful relationship. … Either that or he surrenders to his high car payments and agrees to star in a cheesy reality show for a quick buck.

Monday 16

“Victoria Beckham: Coming to America” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) What was originally intended to be a weekly reality series has been scaled back to a single one-hour special due to either: A) a complete lack of reality in Beckham’s life, or B) a total disinterest in the once-and-future Spice Girl, her hunky but boring soccer-playing hubby and her freakish, coconut-shaped breast implants.

Tuesday 17

“Just for Laughs” (KOAT-7 7 p.m.) Sigh . Yet another hidden camera prank show. Thanks a lot, Allen Funt!

“The Bill Engvall Show” (TBS 7 p.m.) The redneck comedian goes suburban for his first sitcom.

Wednesday 18

“Ghost Hunters” (Sci-Fi 7 p.m.) For the season finale the TAPS team hangs out at the site of the infamous Manson Murders.

“Back to the Grind” (TV Land 8:30 p.m.) I’m forced to admit slight interest in this almost-reality series in which actors are asked to actually perform the jobs they pretended to do for years on TV. Tonight, Loni Anderson tries her hand at being a receptionist, while Erik Estrada attempts police work.
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