Week In Sloth

The Week In Sloth

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Thursday 24

“Alaska Oilmen: Gamble on the Ice” (Discovery 6 p.m.) Discovery Channel continues its Alaska Week promotion with this new documentary, which only seems to reinforce the week’s contention that Alaska is the most dangerous frickin’ place on Earth to live or work.

“Lost” (ABC 9:02 p.m.) You can have your “Ugly Betty” and your “Grey’s Anatomy”–both of which return to finish out their season earlier tonight. Me, I’m only interested in what’s happening on “Lost.” We know who the Oceanic Six are. Now all we’ve got to figure out is how the heck they got off the island and why some of them want to go back.

Friday 25

The Party (TCM 6 p.m.) Turner Classic Movies is in a party mood tonight, starting with Peter Sellers in this raucous 1968 comedy. The festivities continue with Annette Funicello in 1964’s Pajama Party starting at 8 p.m. and 1957’s somewhat more serious The Bachelor Party (written by Paddy Chayefsky) starting at 9:30 p.m.

“Moonlight” (KRQE-13 8 p.m.) So, according to CBS’ supernatural detective drama (returning tonight from its brief, writers strike-induced hiatus), vampires and humans can’t get it on. But now that main vamp Mick (Alex O’Loughlin) is “cured,” there’s nothing stopping him from biting into Beth (Sophie Myles) in the recreational sense.

Saturday 26

“The Mighty B” (Nickelodeon 8:30 p.m.) It’s a good weekend for “Saturday Night Live” gal Amy Poehler, who opens in theaters in Baby Mama and also provides the main voice for this kiddy cartoon about an overzealous Honeybee Trooper determined to earn every Honeybee badge in creation.

“Robin Hood” (BBC America 7 p.m.) The second season of the Beeb’s medieval romp has more in common with “Hercules: The Legendary Journeys” than it does with a history text. But if you like your action-adventure frothy and filled with photogenic stars, get to watching.

Sunday 27

“Celebracadabra” (VH1 7 p.m.) Otherwise known as “So You Think You Can Perform Stage Magic: Celebrity Edition” or “Prestidigitating With the Stars.” And what sort of “stars” do we have? Well, there’s irritating comedian Ant, Pussycat Doll Kimberly Wyatt, ’80s direct-to-video king C. Thomas Howell … Oh, stop crying, the Apocalypse will soon be here, putting us all out of our misery.

“Carrier” (KNME-5 9 p.m.) PBS launches a five-night look inside the world of the 5,000 crew members of the U.S.S. Nimitz, a nuclear-powered aircraft carrier deployed in the Persian Gulf.

Monday 28

Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie (Sci-Fi 9 p.m.) Sadly, not a sequel to the 1994 live-action film starring Jean-Claude Van Damme, but an animated version of the popular video game.

Tuesday 29

The Streak (ESPN 2 7 p.m.) Sadly, not a documentary about Ray Stevens’ 1974 novelty song, but a documentary about the Brandon High School Wrestling Team’s 34-year winning streak.

Wednesday 30

“Farmer Wants a Wife” (KWBQ-19 8 p.m.) It’s a reality dating show in which uptight city gals in high heels try to make time with a hunky, tractor-riding hick. … Man, that Apocalypse can’t get here fast enough.
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