Thursday 25
“Super Troopers: Thirty Years of ABBA” (KNME-5 7 p.m.) This new special traces the creation and evolution of Sweden's most metallic-and-Spandex-clad musical quartet. I defy you to get even one of this show's tunes out of your head for the next three days.
“Being Bobby Brown” (Bravo 8 p.m.) With the first season of Bravo's car-wreck-compelling reality series going off the air tonight, I predict a mere four- to six-month delay before the network rushes “Being Courtney Love” onto the air. … Mark my words.
Friday 26
“Rachael Ray's Tasty Travels” (Food Network 7:30 p.m.) Food Network's cutesy cook gets a new show. Just for fun, pick a search engine and type in “I hate Rachael Ray.” … Sorry, little missy, but you are no Anthony Bourdain.
Saturday 27
Pterodactyl (Sci-Fi 7 p.m.) Tonight's typically self-explanatory “Sci-Fi Channel Original” movie is no better than any other. But, for those with a historical bent, it was directed by longtime C-grade moviemaker Mark Lester (Truck Stop Women, Roller Boogie, Class of 1984, Commando). Mr. Lester, if you're out there, lemme just take this opportunity to say thank you for getting Lynda Carter naked in Bobbie Jo and the Outlaw.
Sunday 28
“The 4400” (USA 7 p.m.) Last season's finale revealed that the 4400 were actually time travelers. What will this season's capper expose?
“Parco: P.I.” (Court TV 8 p.m.) Court TV goes the reality show route with this new series about a whole family of private investigators. It's like “Hart to Hart” got Crazy Glued to “Simon & Simon.”
“MTV Video Music Awards” (MTV 9 p.m.) The big news? Gwen Stefani is boycotting. But the newly rechristened “Diddy” will be there. I don't know who wins, but we all lose.
“Rome” (HBO 10 p.m.) HBO's outrageously expensive “Soprano”-ization of ancient Rome gets underway tonight. It's no “I, Claudius,” but it does last 12 weeks and there's plenty of sex, murder and Senatorial intrigue.
Monday 29
“Prison Break” (KASA-2 7 p.m.) FOX's bold new action series bolts out of the gate way before the official fall season gets underway. The “Oz”-meets-“24” storyline concerns an architect who gets arrested just so he can help his brother (framed for murdering the vice president's brother, apparently) bust out of death row. The show promises to be gritty and epic, but probably requires a weekly commitment, so sign on now.
Tuesday 30
“Stella” (Comedy Central 11:30 p.m.) I'm still not sure it's funny, but it is awfully damn odd. The season finale of “Stella” arrives with the boys heading off (en masse, of course) to a therapist to cure their depression.
Wednesday 31
“Top Ten” (TV Land 8 p.m.) TV Land's agreeably time-filling VH1-esque “list” series tonight counts down TV's top 10 most beautiful women. … Well, “The Golden Girls” take up four slots, but after that, I'm stumped.