Week In Sloth: “A White House Christmas,” “The Mayan Apocalypse” And The End Of “Jersey Shore”

The Week In Sloth

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Thursday 20

“A White House Christmas: First Families Remember” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) Former presidents and their families reminisce about holidays in the White House.

“2012 The End is Now” (History 7 p.m.) Just in case the world ends at 12:01 a.m. on Dec. 21, History Channel is hedging its bet. Tonight, conspiracy king Brad Metzler connects the dots between ancient Mayan prophecy and modern science to decide exactly what’s going to wipe us all out.

“Jersey Shore” (MTV 11 p.m.) The series finale of “Jersey Shore” airs. Funny, that doesn’t sound like an end-of-the-world-as-we-know-it event. The premiere of “Jersey Shore” maybe.

Friday 21

“Back to the Beginning with Christiane Amanpour” (KOAT-7 8 p.m) ABC goes all biblical on us, checking out history from the Great Flood to Jesus.

“The Doctor Who Ultimate List of Lists” (BBC America 8 p.m.) Top Five Companions, Top Five Scariest Moments, Top Five Best Monsters, Top Five Guest Stars. Whovians, feel free to start the infighting now.

“The Mayan Apocalypse 2012” (National Geographic 8 p.m.) In case we’re still waiting for it to arrive at 8 p.m. MST

“Christmas in Washington 2012” (TNT 9 p.m.) Diana Ross, Megan Hilty, Demi Lovato, Scotty McCreery and PSY perform at the National Building Museum. What are the odds Joe Biden gets down “Gangnam Style”?

Saturday 22

“Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) You know the holidays are upon us when networks are digging back to 1962 for C-grade Christmas specials.

“Oddities: Holiday Bizarre Special” (Science 7 p.m.) Nothing says Christmas like a two-headed baby in the manger.

“The Year in Pup Culture” (Animal Planet 7 p.m.) AnPlan covers all the top dog-related news stories of the year, like … um.

Sunday 23

Miracle on 34th Street (AMC 4:30 a.m.) Programmers at AMC give up big-time, scheduling a marathon that lasts until 9:30 p.m. Christmas Eve.

The Sound of Music (KOAT-7 6 p.m.) Networks always play The Sound of Music this time of year because it gives them a nice, four-hour break for their office Christmas party.

“Christmas at Luther: Tidings of Comfort and Joy” (KNME-5 7 p.m.) Luther College in Decorah, Iowa, makes with the choral/symphonic music.

Monday 24

A Christmas Story (TNT 6 p.m.) TNT launches its traditional “24 Hours of A Christmas Story” stunt.

It’s a Wonderful Life (KOB-4 7 p.m.) It’s unavoidable this time of year.

“After Jesus: The First Christians” (CNN 8 p.m.) The mainstream liberal media continues its war on Christmas by reminding viewers what Jesus and his followers actually stood for.

Tuesday 25

See “Idiot Box.”

Wednesday 26

“The Best Funeral Ever” (TLC 6 p.m.) It took this long to get a reality show about a funeral home?

“The 35th Annual Kennedy Center Honors” (KRQE-13 8 p.m.) Dustin Hoffman, David Letterman, ballerina Natalai Makarova and Led Zeppelin get the nod.
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