Week In Sloth: “Comic Store Heroes,” “Freaks & Creeps,” “Virgin Diaries”

The Week In Sloth

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Thursday 12

“Polyamory: Married & Dating” (Showtime 9 p.m.) Showtime one-ups TLC by cutting out the Mormon aspects of “Sister Wives” and going straight to polyamorous couples for this titillating new docu-reality show.

Friday 13

“Comic Con All-Access Live” (Spike 2 p.m.) Spike heads to San Diego Comic-Con for some all-day ogling of cool toys, famous movie stars and girls in Poison Ivy costumes.

“AOTS Attacks Comic Con” (G4 5 p.m.) “Attack of the Show” heads to Comic-Con a few hours behind the Spike folks. Expect the nerd culture to go deeper here, though.

“Comic Store Heroes” (National Geographic 6 p.m.) Nat Geo doesn’t go to Comic-Con, per se, but celebrates the medium nonetheless with this slightly more realistic version of Kevin Smith’s “Comic Book Men” set in Manhattan’s venerable Midtown Comics.

God Bless Ozzy Osbourne (Showtime 7 p.m.) Because the members of the Osbourne family need to be on TV more.

Saturday 14

An American Girl: McKenna Shoots for the Stars (KOB-4 7 p.m.) NBC further stokes Olympic fever with this adaptation of the “American Girl” doll/novel series about a little gal gunning for gymnastics glory. Nia Vardalos, Ian Ziering and Cathy Rigby star.

Sunday 15

“Political Animals” (USA 8 p.m.) This six-part miniseries (or “limited series,” depending on how you look at it) stars Sigourney Weaver as a divorced former first lady and current secretary of state. (Huh. I wonder if that’s based on anyone.) Carla Gugino, Ciarán Hinds, Ellen Burstyn, Dylan Baker and Adrian Pasdar round out the impressive cast.

“Combat Pawn” (truTV 8:30 p.m.) The folks at truTV do their best to be the straw that broke the camel’s back in TV’s “pawn shop” reality show genre.

“Small Town Security” (AMC 9 p.m.) AMC’s newest “unscripted” (read: “sorta reality-like”) series focusses on a family who owns a private security company in rural Georgia. … I continue to be amazed at television’s ability to find both celebrities and ordinary folks who are boring as crap.

“Black Dynamite” (Cartoon Network 12:30 a.m.) The ass-kicking 2009 cult film returns for more blaxploitation awesomeness. Writer/star Michael Jai White is back voicing the titular kung fu detective—now in convenient animated form.

Monday 16

“Eureka” (Syfy 7 p.m.) The “mad scientists in small-town America” series comes to an end.

“Market Warriors” (KNME-5 9 p.m.) PBS surrenders fully to the “buying and selling people’s old crap” genre with this amped-up flea-market treasure hunter series.

Tuesday 17

“Freaks & Creeps” (National Geographic Wild 8 p.m.) NGW starts off this new series about weird animals by going to the same place every show about weird animals goes for its pilot episode—Australia to gawk at Tasmanian devils, echidnas and platypuses (platypi?).

Wednesday 18

“Virgin Diaries #2” (TLC 8 p.m.) TLC’s portrait of fumbling, dorky, clueless first-timers returns for another round of cringe-inducing personal profiles (like, for example, “Skippy”—the 34-year-old Mormon who lives in his parents’ basement and brings his “wing mom” along on dates).
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