Week In Sloth: Puppy Bowls, Kitty Bowls And Something Called A “Super Bowl”?

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Thursday 29

“Parenthood” (KOB-4 9pm) NBC’s tear-jerky drama (based on the Ron Howard movie of the same name) goes off the air. I guess everyone’s done being parents.

“Breaking Greenville” (truTV 8:30pm) This new “docudrama” focuses on morning TV show anchors battling it out for control of the airwaves in the small-market town of Greenville, S.C.

“Close Up Kings” (Syfy 9pm) Each week three close up magicians “complete bizarre challenges in different cities.”

Friday 30

“VH1 + Papa John’s Super Bowl Blitz: A Concert for the Troops” (VH1 7pm) Sure, sure, support the troops and all. But you know who else does good work? Doctors, nurses, teachers. Maybe some of them would like to see Fall Out Boy too.

“NFL RUSH: Super Bowl XLIX Preview Special” (Nickelodeon 7pm) Nickelodeon jumps on the Super Bowl bandwagon, getting tweens hyped up for the big game.

“Key & Peele Super Bowl Special” (Comedy Central 11pm) The eponymous stars of Comedy Central sketch comedy hit “Key & Peele” host an hour-long special, sports desk style, lampooning the impending Super Bowl and the hype surrounding it.

Saturday 31

Beautiful & Twisted (Lifetime 6pm) Rob Lowe (St. Elmo’s Fire) and Paz Vega (Sex and Lucia) star in this (of course sensationalized) version of hotel heir Ben Novack Jr.’s murder.

“NFL Honors” (KOB-4 8pm) The big game is tomorrow, so the NFL takes time to hand out some random awards.

Sunday 1

“Kitten Bowl II” (Hallmark 10am) Hallmark’s latecomer to the “Super Bowl alternative” programming starts early. But there’s no rush; it repeats all day until 7pm.

“Puppy Bowl XI” (Animal Planet 1pm) Meanwhile, AnPlan’s now-venerable cute-ternative repeats until 1am.

“Super Bowl XLIX” (KOB-4 4pm) Finally, after drowning in puppy and kitty videos all day, we get to watch defending Super Bowl champs the Seattle Seahawks take on the New England Patriots.

Monday 2

“Gotham” (KASA-2 7pm) Who’s popping by tonight? A man by the name of “Dr. Crane”? Why, that would be the father of the guy who becomes the Scarecrow. Damn, Bruce, you’d better grow up and become Batman soon because Gotham’s getting crowded with villains at this point.

Tuesday 3

“Street Art Throwdown” (Oxygen 7pm) Ten promising street artists compete for a $100,000 prize. Is one of them Banksy? One of them could be Banksy. For all we know.

“Limo Wars” (A&E 8pm) How many years has America been forced to endure these endless limo wars? When will Congress step in? When will the United Nations intervene?

Wednesday 4

“Fresh Off the Boat” (KOAT-7 7:30pm) Restaurateur Eddie Huang’s autobiography gets turned into a sitcom about growing up as the son of Taiwanese immigrants.
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