Week In Sloth: Tv Highlights Include Gang Dogs, Ninja Warrior, “Gates Of Hell,” Cropsey, And Roasting David Hasselhoff

The Week In Sloth

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Thursday 12

“American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior” (TLC 7 p.m.) Thanks to family infighting (or a need to inject some drama into their seven-year-old cable reality show), Paul Teutul Jr. has split off from his pa and opened a rival motorcycle customization shop.

Friday 13

“Solve My Mystery” (KOB-4 8 p.m.) From the producers of “Dateline” comes “a new crime story experience.” The show is basically reenactments of unsolved murders—as narrated by the victims! It’s like “Unsolved Mysteries,” but with less Robert Stack.

Cropsey: The Urban Legend (ID 7 p.m.) If you missed the theatrical screenings of Joshua Zeman and Barbara Brancaccio’s freaky horror documentary about a Staten Island serial killer and his eerie connection to a longtime urban legend, you can catch it right here on ID.

Saturday 14

“25 Reasons to Worship Ninja Warrior” (G4 4 p.m.) G4 looks back at the history of the fan favorite Japanese game show. After that, G4 takes us out to the obstacle course for three hours’ worth of all-new “Ninja Warrior” action.

Sunday 15

“The Comedy Central Roast of David Hasselhoff” (Comedy Central 11 p.m.) You gotta give credit to the producers of the Comedy Central Roasts: They know how to pick their straw dogs.

“The Great Food Truck Race” (Food Network 8 p.m.) Seven real teams from the best food trucks in America compete in a race/cook-off across the country. The winning team gets $50,000.

“Baby Birthday Bashes” (BBC America 8 p.m.) Oh, awesome. Another thing for insane parents to obsess over, waste ridiculous amounts of money on and come to blows with other parents over.

Monday 16

“Animal Planet Investigates: Gang Dogs” (Animal Planet 8 p.m.) What is this world coming to? Even dogs have gangs? Is it safe to go to the dog park these days?

“Hardcore Pawn” (truTV 8 p.m.) If you love “Pawn Stars,” you’ll be slightly more than disinterested in “Hardcore Pawn.”

“The Big C” (Showtime 8:30 p.m.) Laura Linney ( Kinsey , John Adams ) stars in this sitcom about a suburban mother diagnosed with skin cancer.

Tuesday 17

“Melissa & Joey” (ABC Family 8 p.m.) Melissa Joan Hart (you remember: “Sabrina, the Teenage Witch”) teams up with Joey Lawrence (you remember: “Gimme a Break!”) for some wacky hijinks about a successful woman who hires a male nanny to care for a couple of precocious kids (you know: the plot to “Who’s the Boss?”).

“Gates of Hell” (History 7 p.m.) A documentary crew visits six locations traditionally believed to be entrances to Hell. What do they find? Crushing disappointment, I’m guessing.

Wednesday 18

“Surviving the Cut” (Discovery 8 p.m.) Raw recruits struggle with the challenges of U.S. Army Ranger School. And being on a reality TV show.
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