The World'S Easiest Breakfast Burrito

The Morning-After'S Ultimate Parting Gift: A Hearty Breakfast

Liza Wheeler
2 min read
Share ::
You roll over on Sunday morning and look at the clock glowing 7:45. Your head hurts, you roll the other direction and see her. Suddenly it all comes back to you: playing pool, drinking beer, the cute girl, late-night whiskey shots, bringing her back to your house. And she's still in your bed!

You could cower under the blankets contemplating your drinking habits or whether she's girlfriend material despite her slutty tendencies. But why? Time's a wastin'. The game starts in two hours. Whether or not you like this girl is irrelevant. You started this pajama party, and it's up to you to finish it. You're making her breakfast, and she's going to be totally impressed. Then, if you don't want to ever call her again, at least you can do so knowing you sent her off with a full belly.

A good breakfast after drunken sex is like a happy ending to a massage—it's a pleasant surprise when it happens and leaves a lasting impression. And if you do like this girl, it's an imperative bridge to post-breakfast, before-she-leaves-the-house sex. And it's simpler than you might think.

My personal fav, and the one I'm going to share with you here, is the standard breakfast burrito. A true playah will plan ahead and have necessary ingredients in the house before the weekend gets underway (call it cautious optimism). Go to the grocery store on Thursday and buy milk, eggs, cheese, green chiles, tortillas and either bacon or sausage. If you're a true Rico Suave, you'll buy orange juice and champagne so she can sip on a mimosa while you work your magic in the kitchen.

Eating In

1 2 3 193